Chapter 87: There’s only one boring way

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Translator: Soafp

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[Mari PoV]

People who have experienced betrayal from others find it difficult to muster resolve.

That’s why I can’t seem to move on.

Making excuses, I continue to waste time fruitlessly.

No matter how many times our bodies intertwine, my heart remains somewhere far away.

“…Sorry, Mari-san.”

Because of that, when Kazunari kneels before me, I find myself strangely detached, as if it’s someone else’s problem.

“I… knowing that Maya is dying soon, I couldn’t help but want to be there till the end. It’s nothing but a betrayal to you, Mari-san.”

Even though we’ve been together, Kazunari still calls me “Mari-san”. Meanwhile, Maya is casually called by her first name.

In every word and gesture, there’s a hint of underlying emotions.

Perhaps, I was like that too.

We licked each other’s wounds, tried to heal, but deep down, nothing changed. That’s all it amounted to.

But one thing is clear.

Both Kazunari and I want to be happy, so being together wasn’t a mistake. We struggled and agonized to find happiness.

So…

“…It’s mutual. Please don’t worry about me, prioritize your feelings. Thank you for everything up until now.”

That’s all I could manage to say.

Still, strangely, I don’t feel much disgust towards Kazunari.

Compared to someone who repeatedly cheated on me in secret and showed no sincere remorse even when caught, Kazunari’s sincerity is admirable.

That’s why I can’t help feeling that way.

In the depths of my heart, where distrust for others couldn’t be erased, perhaps that’s why I started to feel that way towards Kazunari.

The time I spent with Kazunari wasn’t a waste, I’m sure.

I can surely find happiness too.

That’s why, look.

Even the tears flowing are so few.

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“…Is that really okay, Mari? If you want, I could punch Kazunari…”

With things being what they are, I couldn’t help but report everything to Aniki at home, albeit in a slightly troublesome manner, gently admonishing him.

“Do you think you’re in a position to do that?”

“Haha, I suppose not.”

Aniki is likely to get married soon.

Despite everything, overcoming the past and supporting Mizuki is a proud decision for my family.

However, of course, Mizuki herself deeply regrets it, and her position as the one who started the whole mess is delicate. As evidence, not only are Mizuki and Maya not in contact, but Aniki and Kazunari also seem to be growing distant.

Regarding Maya’s condition, both Aniki and Mizuki had no idea.

Kazunari also has various thoughts about Mizuki.

Even so, he prioritized Aniki’s feelings and silently swallowed it. Aniki couldn’t pretend to be self-righteous or a hero.

“…But I’m really worried. Why does Kazunari choose to move towards unhappiness on his own?”

“Do you think ignoring it and pretending not to see it is the right answer, even if Maya ends up like that?”

“N-no, I’m not saying that… but it just feels like it will linger forever. It might even last a lifetime…”

“…I don’t think so.”

“Huh?”

“For Kazunari to come to terms with the past as the past… maybe this was the only way.”

That’s all I said, concluding my report to Aniki .

Honestly, rather than sadness…

My envy towards Kazunari might be stronger.

The past is the past. It’s just a matter of being able to accept that as unfortunate.