Chapter 30:Though there is nothing to forgive

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Translator: Soafp

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In the end, it was almost an hour before Maya left.

Listening to her talk only made me more frustrated, and I was getting tired of hiding.

To ease my irritation a bit, I impulsively went to a nearby convenience store and bought a pack of cigarettes. It had been a long time since I last smoked; I had quit when I got married.

“…Cough, cough!”

I choked because it had been so long. How pathetic. Resorting to nicotine again at this point is pathetic. Why couldn’t I just show my face there? I was being incredibly cowardly.

But one thing was clearly etched in my mind from Maya’s words:

“The most painful thing for me is being forgotten. I can’t bear the thought of being forgiven by being forgotten.”

That was what she said. Seeing Maya kneeling in front of my parents and saying that in my absence made me feel that my attempt to forget her wasn’t wrong. It seemed she was taking quite a hit from it.

…….

But it’s definitely not going to be easy. How much will I have to struggle to reach that point? The future is uncertain. If, as Mari-san said, the wound will always remain, forgetting Maya might be nearly impossible.

And it seems Maya wants to be blamed, to be scolded by me. Is she some kind of extreme m*******t, or does she just want to punish herself by having me berate her?

I need to move my car before Maya comes out.

With tangled thoughts, I started the engine of my car, which was parked on the street, and drove away from my parents’ house.

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“…I’m home.”

“…”

After a pause, I stepped into my parents’ house. I thought at least a greeting was in order, but neither Dad nor Mom responded. I was called here, so what’s with the cold reaction?

“So, what’s the reason you called me here?”

Not even trying to hide my irritation, I brusquely asked my parents.

“…You were watching, weren’t you, Kazunari?”

“…”

Damn, Mom figured it out. That’s a mother for you. But still…

“And so what?”

Sorry, but a simple apology from Maya isn’t going to move my heart now.

“…It’s just a nuisance.”

Dad, visibly irritated by my response, shot back with a sharp look. But I wasn’t the one who did something wrong here.

“I’m fed up too. Besides, if she’s a nuisance, you should have just kept her out of the house.”

“…If we don’t let her in, she just kneels in front of the door and refuses to leave. And she does this frequently, without any intervals.”

“…”

I was simply astonished by Maya’s behavior.

“We can’t ignore her; we have to think about the neighbors. Because you won’t accept her apology, we’re the ones dealing with it.”

“…I’m sorry. But I can’t…”

“…I understand. We won’t ask you to forgive her. Whether you want a divorce or to try to rebuild, you can decide on your own. Do as you like.”

“…Eh?”

“I can tell just by looking at you. You haven’t been eating properly since you got out of the hospital, have you? We’re worried about you.”

“…I’m sorry.”

I expected another round of back-and-forth arguments, but Dad’s concern caught me off guard. I regretted telling them to stay out of this, even if just a little.

But now Dad made it clear. I could proceed with my own thoughts. I could do as I wanted.

Until now, all I’d heard from others were words criticizing my attitude. But now, both Katsuragi and my parents were telling me to do as I like, and it lightened my heart a bit.

“Well… just try to minimize the impact on us as much as possible. You should be the priority as the victim here.”

“…I’ll do my best.”

“Thinking it over, Maya-san might be someone who can’t let go of what she once had…”

The irony that my haggard appearance convinced my parents to change their minds was almost laughable.