Chapter 11: True feelings of a friend

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Translator: Soafp

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[Maya’s PoV]

“Sorry, Mizuki. Thanks for listening to my complaints.”

It was the night when Kazunari vomited blood in the hospital.

After returning to the empty house, my friend Mizuki Konno visited me out of concern.

I confided in her about everything that I couldn’t tell anyone else.

“Yeah, I guess it can’t be helped. I mean, I was the one who introduced Maya to Kazunari.”

“Thank you.”

“But you know, as your friend, I have to say this. Maya is 100% at fault this time.”

“…”

“And what’s this? The other person is your ex-boyfriend? That’s the worst. Why are you cheating when you have such a good husband? Idiot.”

“…”

“First of all, Maya, didn’t you break up with Naoki because he cheated on you with another woman? You should know how painful it is to be betrayed by someone you’re dating, so why would you do such a thing?”

It was criticism from a friend that I couldn’t argue with. But the words hurt too much.

I felt like crying, but if I cried now…

“Do you understand how it feels to be on the receiving end when you cry as soon as things don’t go your way?”

I couldn’t let myself cry because I didn’t want to hear those words from him again.

“…Yeah. I was really stupid. It hurts so much that I feel like dying.”

“Don’t be so naive.”

“!”

I tried to show remorse by consciously not crying, but then Mizuki’s further criticism made me freeze involuntarily.

“It’s not you who wants to die, it’s Kazunari, isn’t it? Are you still only thinking about yourself? It must be easy for you. If you die, you won’t have to worry about anything anymore.”

“…”

“I understand the feeling of wanting to die, but Maya, if you are such a hopeless idiot that you chooses death here, I’ll sprinkle ashes on your memorial tablet.”

I was scared of Mizuki’s scolding, so I instinctively looked away. Then, Mizuki, as if telling me not to look away, gently held my face in her hands and turned it back to face her, speaking softly. Just that part was gentle.

“Don’t look away. Don’t run away. Don’t give up. Don’t be selfish. You must face Kazunari-kun properly.”

She said.

“If it’s for that, I’ll do anything too. For the sake of my best friend.”

“…A-Aaaaaaaaaahhhh…”

I didn’t mean to play the victim, but at that moment, I reached my breaking point.

Like a dam breaking, I couldn’t help but cry.

I was causing trouble not only for him but also for Mizuki.

What on earth was I doing?

I want to die, but I won’t die.

But…

If I could, I would want to be reborn as a beautiful person.

…Maybe that wish won’t come true anymore.