Chapter 65: Bangs, Sunset and Her

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Translator: Soafp

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After the test, and after the results were announced, the class turned into absolute chaos.

Of course, that’s because the test papers were being handed back. Meanwhile, I sat there with a full smile (in my heart), eagerly awaiting my results.

“…First place, huh…”

After school.

I lost count of how many times I mumbled that. As I walked home in the evening, I let out the same words again.

[—”Well done.”—]

Yumesaki-san said that to me after Hiiragi-san went back to her seat. She really is a kind person. Who was it that said she was scary? (←).

Shiori: “Congratulations!”

Shiori: “You were really amazing, Toumachi-kun.”

Hajime Toumachi: “No, no, not at all…”

Momo sent me a message like that.

It made me so happy I thought I might just disappear.

Am I… vanishing?

Please, don't let this all be a dream. I hate those stories that end with “It was all a dream…” in fantasy genres (just a personal opinion).

“….”

But.

The one person I really wanted to hear from, Hatsune-san, hadn't said a word to me yet.

Honestly, I felt a little awkward. It'd be weird to go bragging about “Hey, I got first place!” out of the blue. Well, I figured it was okay—Kisaragi-san probably mentioned it to her—

Brrrring!

“Hmm?”

Suddenly, my phone rang. The name displayed was ‘Momo Hatsune.’

I answered the call—

“Sorry for the sudden call.”

“N-no, it's fine.”

“Can we meet at our usual place and time today?”

Her words came as soon as I picked up.

“Got it.”

“Thanks. See you then.”

---

I looked at the clock—7:00 PM.

If I think about it, this might be the time I check the clock the most. Ten minutes before our meeting time—this moment is always etched in my memory.

It's only happened a few times, but still. It's memorable enough for me.

Momo: “I'm almost there.”

Hajime Toumachi: “Roger that.”

I sat on a bench, watching the sunset. The sun isn't setting as quickly as it used to.

For some reason, I thought it was beautiful, so I took a picture. I looked at it through the photo app on my phone.

“….”

As expected, things look better through my own eyes. I mean—this rainbow-colored hair of mine, right? (Typical narcissistic thoughts).

As time passes, little by little, I think I'm starting to like who I am as Hajime Toumachi. Though, I might be getting a bit too full of myself after getting first place.

Now that I think about it, my hair's gotten longer. On top of that, I recently impulse-bought a hair iron and tried straightening my hair, so now my view is blocked by my bangs. Not as long as Hatsune-san's though.

Yeah, I suddenly felt like trying something stylish. Just my bangs, I swear. I actually like it—a very introverted vibe (certified introvert, level one).

“…Icchi.”

“Ou.”

A soft voice called out.

That familiar nickname.

I quickly stood up from the bench when I saw her standing beside me—

“—There's no one else around, so let's just talk here, okay?”

“Eh?”

Hatsune-san said that, sitting next to me. The bench was meant for two, so there was plenty of space… but she sat close!

“Icchi, you're amazing. First place.”

“…Th-thanks.” (Embarrassed)

Being told that so close, I couldn't help but avert my eyes.

My face is burning up. It must be 40°C out here, right? (Extreme weather).

“You worked really hard.”

“…Haha, no, I had it under control.”

“Liar.”

“W-well, maybe I tried a little bit…”

“It wasn't just ‘a little,’ was it?”

“…Okay, maybe a tiny bit more than ‘a little’…” (Linguistic skills crumbling)

“Hmm?”

Ah, I'm terrible at lying.

Though Kisaragi-san seemed to believe me… wait, does that mean she knew all along?

“It was only a midterm test, and just for the first semester. Maybe others weren't giving it their all.”

“…”

“Uh, well… it's just for my own satisfaction, really.”

“…I thought for sure you were working so hard because of us.”

“Haha (Advanced conversational technique: laugh it off).”

[I want to be thought well of.]

[I want to be relied upon.]

[I want to be invited again.]

For the sake of my selfish desires, I lied to both of them.

Because, if I were to be honest, I'd come off as that kind of “clingy guy.” I had to maintain a cool, composed image.

…But really, that study session was something precious, something important to me. So much so, that I felt it wouldn’t matter even if my own grades dropped.

My first real friends.

My first real event.

It made my heart race, and even the preparation for it was fun.

“…Hey, Icchi.”

“Hm?”

“Thank you.”

“! Th-thank you… I hope your scores improved too.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Huh—”

In that moment, I felt something warm. Instinctively, I turned to look at Hatsune-san.

At some point, her hand had reached out and was gently touching my forehead.

“S-stop…”

A weak voice escaped me.

Even though my long bangs should have been covering it, hiding it from view. Now, with my vision cleared, I could see everything.

“You've got terrible dark circles. You've been worrying all this time, haven't you?”

“Ah…”

“You were thinking about what would happen if you fell from fifth place, right? You didn't seem well at all. You haven't been able to sleep up until today, have you?”

“N-no, that's not—”

“It is, though.”

Hatsune-san said that, locking her eyes with mine. There was no escaping now. She could see straight through me.

It was embarrassing.

It was humiliating.

It was painful.

“Everything's out in the open now, Icchi.”

“…”

“Even if you look away, I can tell.”

“…Right.”

Ah.

I can't lie anymore.

“It must've been tough, right? I'm sorry.”

“…You're exaggerating. It was just a midterm—”

“Icchi.”

“Ugh.”

“Let it out. To me.”

“…!”

“We're friends now, so—tell me everything.”

“I… don't have anything—”

“Icchi. Tell me. Don't hold back, okay?”

Her words, and those earnest eyes. I couldn't keep it together anymore.

“I'll be fine, I promise.”

All those feelings I'd been bottling up, pushing deep inside—now, they all overflowed.

“…I was scared. No matter how well things were going, I couldn't shake the thought that I might make a mistake.” (Toumachi)

“Little mistakes, calculation errors, tricky problems—everything. I was constantly anxious.” (Toumachi)

“It felt like the fear of dropping from fifth place was going to crush me.” (Toumachi)

“…Yeah.”

“I was so worried that if I dropped after boasting so much, I wouldn't be able to face either of you again.” (Toumachi)

“The study sessions were so fun, but if I messed up, I thought we wouldn't be able to do them anymore. I thought I'd lose face in front of the two of you—” (Toumachi)

The words poured out of me.

I must look terrified right now.

I know that. But I can't stop.

What else can I do?

So, please, just look away already.

“You’re really not good at handling things, huh, Icchi?”

“…Sorry.”

“Haha, don't make that face. If anything, it's me who should be apologizing.”

…Ah, I can't.

Not when you're so close.

Please, don't keep speaking so gently to me.

“…Hey, Icchi. I know everything.” (Momo)

“About how you prepared that day, all for our sake.” (Momo)

“About how you threw yourself into the test, more than usual, for us.” (Momo)

“About how you carried everything on your own shoulders, for us.” (Momo)

“Everything, all of it. That’s why—” (Momo)

Please, stop.

I'm begging you.

I can't hold it in anymore—

“Thank you for working so hard for us.”

—In the evening.

On a bench near the station, beside the setting sun and her gentle smile. That beautiful scene—

Right now.

It's all blurred and warped, fading from view.