Oneshot: A Century-Long Love Fades As Childhood Friends Drift into Hell – If I Had Confessed Earlier, Would Anything Have Changed?

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Translator: Soafp

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After advancing to my second year of high school, two weeks had passed.

It was Thursday, when sixth period was cut.

Behind the school building after classes.

I told my childhood friend Mutsuki—who was in a different class for the first time—

“I never really understood it until now, but I realized I like you, Mutsuki. I like you. Please go out with me… as my girlfriend.”

That's how I confessed.

Ever since we ended up in different classes for the first time, I had fewer chances to see her.

And as if searching for something precious every day, I kept finding myself looking for her.

In that strange feeling of loss and loneliness.

I realized my feelings for Mutsuki weren't just because she was my childhood friend always by my side, but because she was a girl I wanted to stay with from now on, too.

To tell her those feelings.

Because I wanted to change our relationship.

I confessed.

But…

“…I-I'm sorry, Seiji-kun.”

“Eh…?”

“I-I'm… a-already dating someone…”

“W-what? S-since when…?”

“Th-this Monday… Ikezaki-kun from my class confessed to me, and so…”

“M-Monday…?”

I was too late.

We had been in the same class all through our first year, and I was always near her, certain she wasn't dating anyone.

But in just one week of our second year, she got a boyfriend.

“I-I see. So that's how it is…”

“Y-yeah. I-I'm sorry.”

“No, it's not your fault. I was just… too slow to realize my own feelings…”

Monday and Thursday.

Just a difference of three days.

And I had already lost the place beside my precious childhood friend.

After she said that Ikezaki-kun was waiting for her at the school gate, she walked away, looking back at me two or three times.

I moved to my classroom, and with no intention of doing anything, I just sat there until sunset.

Then I went home.

Even when Mom talked to me, I answered vaguely.

When my younger sister spoke to me, I ignored her.

I locked myself in my room and stared blankly at the ceiling.

At some point, I fell asleep.

When I woke up, I didn't feel like getting up.

On Friday, Mom scolded me as I skipped school.

I kept myself locked away.

By Saturday evening, my stomach growled loudly.

“…No matter what's going on, I still get hungry, huh.”

Even after such an emotional shock, my stomach still growled, and I couldn't help but laugh at myself.

I called out to Mom in the kitchen and had her warm up some food.

While eating, I told her that Mutsuki had turned me down.

Mom sighed and told me to look for a new love.

It didn't feel that simple.

But her words felt like a good push to help me shift my feelings.

Sunday.

I spent the whole day quietly at home.

My head filled with thoughts.

And in the end, I concluded this heartbreak was my own fault.

I didn't know if I would be able to let go of my feelings for Mutsuki.

But I felt like I could at least try to move forward.

Monday morning.

I couldn't quite say I was over it, but I headed to school.

But on the way, in front of the park near my house—

For some reason, Mutsuki was standing there.

And as if she had been waiting for me, she smiled when she saw me.

“Good morning, Seiji-kun.”

She greeted me.

“…What's wrong, Mutsuki? Why are you here?”

“…I was waiting for you, Seiji-kun.”

“Waiting… for me?”

My heart thumped loudly.

“Um, you see, Seiji-kun… I… I went on a date with Ikezaki-kun on Saturday.”

Instantly, it felt like I was thrown from the sky down into the depths of the earth.

“But…”

“But?”

“When I was talking with Ikezaki-kun… I kept thinking about you the whole time…”

“That means…”

…No way.

“I said yes to Ikezaki-kun, but the truth is, I've always liked you, Seiji-kun.”

“M-Mutsuki…”

“When I actually went on the date, my head was just full of you…”

“I-I see…”

“Ever since you told me you liked me… I've just been… floating.”

I swallowed hard.

“Hey, Seiji-kun.”

With her cheeks bright red, Mutsuki looked down.

“I'm going to break up with Ikezaki-kun… so will you go out with me?”

It was the line I'd fantasized about countless times over the last three days—something I thought would never happen.

That's what she said.

The answer was probably obvious. Yes.

But…

Something inside me just didn't settle.

“…Mutsuki, um, I'm really happy to hear how you feel, but…”

“Eh?”

“Saying ‘I'll break up with him, so go out with me'—I think that's wrong. That's not okay.”

“W-why? We haven't even held hands yet.”

“That's not the point.”

“Of course we haven't kissed or anything.”

“That's not it. Listen, Mutsuki. If you had already broken up, then maybe I could understand. But saying ‘I'll break up, so…'—that's not fair to Ikezaki-kun.”

“T-that's not true.”

“It is. If I were Ikezaki-kun, I wouldn't want something like that to happen to me.”

“Seiji-kun…”

“…On Thursday, when I called you out to confess, I was actually terrified, embarrassed, completely unsure of myself… and even then, I used every bit of courage I had to do it. Confessing takes an incredible amount of energy.”

“Y-yeah…”

“And in the end, I got rejected… but anyway, I think Ikezaki-kun used that same kind of courage when he confessed to you.”

“…”

“And you know that, too. That's why you couldn't say right away on Thursday that you were going to break up with him, right?”

“That's…”

“Right?”

“But I like you, Seiji-kun. I love you…”

“I liked you too, Mutsuki. But I think… we missed each other.”

I walked past her.

“S-Seiji-kun…”

“Take good care of Ikezaki-kun…”

Mutsuki stayed there, frozen in place.

After that, Mutsuki started acting strange.

“Hey, Seiji-kun, this girl—Sumika Miyo—she says she thinks you're nice. Why don't you try going out with her?”

She tried to set me up with Miyo Sumika.

Of course, I had no feelings for her, so I immediately declined.

“Seiji-kun, tomorrow's Saturday—let's go to the aquarium with Ikezaki-kun and Sumika! A double date! That would be fun.”

“No, I told you already, I'm not going.”

“The meeting spot is at 9, at the north exit.”

“I said I'm not going.”

She kept trying to force a double date.

I didn't go, and no matter how many times my phone rang, I didn't answer.

In the evening, she came to my house to complain.

“Why didn't you come to the meeting place, Seiji-kun!? Sumika was crying!”

“No, that's not my problem. I told you I wasn't going.”

“I ended up breaking a promise, you know!?”

“I never promised anything.”

A hundred-year love can cool. Maybe that's just how it is.

“…Why won't you come?”

“I already turned Sumika down. Stop doing unnecessary things.”

“Go out with Sumika!”

“Why would I?”

“…If I'm going to give up on you because I'm dating Ikezaki-kun… then if you date Sumika… I think I'll be able to give up too…”

“…You want me to date someone just so you can give up? How would that be good for Sumika? I can't date someone for that kind of reason.”

“Why…?”

Tears fell from Mutsuki's eyes.

“Why did it end up like this…?”

“I don't know…”

“I love you, Seiji-kun. I always… always loved you…”

“Then why…”

I probably—

shouldn't have said this next part.

“…If you liked me all along, why did you say yes to Ikezaki-kun's confession? That doesn't make sense.”

“That's because… because you… didn't confess first…” [TL: ????????????????????????????????????????????]

“It's my fault for not confessing first? Then why didn't you confess to me? You loved me all along, didn't you?” [TL: Yeah]

“Because… I was embarrassed… and if you rejected me, I was scared… I couldn't say it…”

“But now you can say ‘I love you' over and over? Because now I said it first, so you feel safe? Give me a break.”

“S-Seiji-kun…”

“You're being selfish, Mutsuki…”

I pushed her away and went inside my house.

---

The next day during lunch break.

Mutsuki came alone to my classroom.

And then, loud enough for everyone inside to clearly hear her,

boldly—

“I told Ikezaki-kun clearly that I like Seiji-kun, so I broke up with him. Seiji-kun. I like you. Please go out with me.”

Mutsuki confessed to me.

Her refreshingly straightforward attitude was so over-the-top that—

my feelings for her completely cooled.

“I can't go out with you, Mutsuki. Sorry.”

I also—

loud enough for everyone in the classroom to hear—

clearly rejected Mutsuki's confession.

---

Even after that, Mutsuki continued trying to appeal to me.

Everyone around us said things like,

“It's not cheating since she properly broke up first,”

or “She's confessing so seriously, it'd be a waste,”

so surprisingly, people were pretty positive about her.

But among them, there were also people who took advantage of the situation, and amplified their own malice toward Mutsuki.

---

Mutsuki was crying outside my house.

“Mutsuki…?”

“S-Seiji… kun…”

“You're crying? What happened?”

“I'm… sorry… I… couldn't… give… you… my… first…”

“Mutsuki?”

…Her first? She couldn't give it?

“…Did something happen? What's wrong?”

“T-they said… they'd help me… so I could… go out with… Seiji-kun… Sumi… ka… called me out…”

“Miyo-san? She called you out?”

“A-and then… Ikezaki-kun… and his… friends… a lot of them… were there… and they held me down… I struggled… but they pinned me… and with their phones… they… recorded…”

A surge of rage hit me, and I immediately called 110.

After the police came, I called Mutsuki's mother and had her take Mutsuki to the hospital.

I was only a childhood friend, so I couldn't stay with her, but a female police officer listened to her story.

Of course, it turned into a huge incident.

Ikezaki, Miyo, and all the others involved were sent to family court. They might even be sent to a regular criminal court, treated like adults despite being minors. Naturally, they were expelled from school.

The police acted fast, and they managed to secure the video before it spread. That was probably the only faint bit of “luck” in all of this.

---

Now, in my living room—

It's me, my mom, Mutsuki’s father and mother, sitting across from us.

“The police say that because the report was quick, the secondary damage of the video spreading was prevented.”

“…”

“We're grateful to you, Seiji-kun.”

“…”

“What happened is terrible, but… at least… Mutsuki wasn't impregnated.”

“…”

“It might be too late to say this, but… Mutsuki loves you, Seiji-kun.”

“…”

I look straight into her father's eyes.

“…Seiji-kun. Won't you… take Mutsuki?”

“…I can't.”

“…I see.”

He closed his eyes for a moment.

Her mother silently began crying.

My mom was crying too.

Her father slowly opened his eyes again.

“Is it truly impossible?”

“…Yes.”

“I won't deny that Mutsuki had some faults in all of this, but—”

“That's wrong. What happened to Mutsuki was entirely their fault. She bears zero responsibility. None. I believe that completely. She's not at fault for what happened. Not at all.”

“Then…”

“…You might not understand even if I say this, but—”

I take a breath.

“…Mutsuki and I had already drifted apart.”

“Seiji-kun…”

“She liked me. But she went out with someone else. When I told her I liked her, she was already with him. And she rejected me. That's how we missed each other. We can't go back and change things with ‘if only' or ‘what if I had.' Time doesn't rewind.”

At some point, her uncle had begun crying too. I thought, adults cry as well.

I didn't cry. Probably because my tears already dried up when Mutsuki rejected me.

And like a family fleeing in the night, Mutsuki's house became empty before anyone noticed.