Chapter 39: Unease

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Translator: Soafp

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“Seina… that outfit…”

She looked as if she had returned to our middle school days.

Her beautiful golden hair fluttered in the wind.

“Haruki-kun!? What are you doing here so early in the morning?”

“Ah… um, I wanted to talk to Seina a little…”

Seiya-san's eyes widened when he saw me show up so early.

Seina frowned suspiciously and roughly brushed her hair aside.

“I have nothing to talk to you about.”

“Seina! How can you speak to Haruki-kun like that!”

“Huh? Whatever, it doesn't matter.”

Seina spat out those words and walked on, not paying me any mind.

“Wait, Seina!”

Ignoring her father Seiya-san's voice, Seina started running away, putting distance between us.

Does that mean she really doesn't want to even talk to me anymore?

“Haruki-kun… can I have a word?”

Lost in thought watching Seina's retreating figure, Seiya-san asked in a low voice.

“Did something happen between you and Seina?”

“Ah… um…”

I hesitated, but seeing Seiya-san's sorrowful expression…

“We had a little fight… it's nothing serious.”

I gave a vague answer to calm things down. I didn't want to make it a bigger problem… and besides…

“Haruki-kun… please, take care of Seina. Since she got involved with you, she's changed a lot. I don't want to show the old version of herself anymore…”

The old Seina…

“Yes… I'll talk to Seina properly.”

I said that and bowed lightly to Seiya-san before chasing after Seina.

Yes… we still haven't talked.

I haven't heard her true feelings.

Even if it ends with us parting ways.

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“Wait, Seina.”

After running for several minutes, I caught up to her.

Noticing me, she turned around.

“What?”

She looked me in the eye and answered.

Maybe she was a little willing to talk to me now.

“About what we talked about the other day… Seina… um.”

Two days ago, her past actions had been revealed.

I thought about it a lot myself… but…

“There's no continuation. What we talked about before is everything. And don't call me by my first name so casually. We're strangers now.”

She spoke calmly but firmly.

“I've always been abnormal. I was bored and wanted some excitement. My heart was thirsty. So… I wanted to satisfy that.”

“So… that was… me?”

Seina nodded quietly.

I understood what she meant by calling me a toy.

“So, I never had romantic feelings for you. Not then, and not now.”

I had guessed as much.

“…Seina, with me—”

“Don't call me by my name!”

Her loud voice echoed through the early morning residential area.

She hated being called by her first name as if to push me away.

“Endo… the fact that we slept together—”

“Women have desires too. I just wanted to do it. We were physically compatible.”

I was just a toy… just being played with…

“But I don't need you anymore, Haruki. I'm already bored. I'm going to find a new toy. I'm… going back to where I started.”

Going back to the beginning…

That word probably reflects her flashy golden appearance.

“After this… I'm meeting Shiho.”

“Whatever… that doesn't concern me.”

Saying that, she turned her back and started walking.

She headed toward our old middle school.

Looking for a new toy…?

Is that why she's doing her teaching practicum there…?

There's still a lot I want to say.

But no words come out.

No matter what I say, it feels like she'll just brush it off now…

And there's hesitation in my heart.

“Sei… Endo. I really liked you.”

At those words, Seina stopped and looked back at me.

“I had fun too. Bye, Asano.”

Seeing her smile quietly, I felt her slipping away from my heart.

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[Shiho]

“Haruki… I want to see you. Not on the phone… I want to talk face to face.”

“…Okay.”

I called Haruki earlier.

I wanted to talk directly.

I already told him how I feel, and that hasn't changed.

What I want to know now is what's in his heart.

“It's nostalgic…”

Now, I'm standing in front of the gate of our old middle school.

It's the first time I've been here since graduation day.

Looking at the school buildings and gym, honestly, all I feel are bitter memories.

Of course.

Because it's the place where I hurt the most important person, Haruki.

I remember that day like it was yesterday.

“Why are you here… Fukase?”

Looking up at the school building, I was spoken to by Haruki's girlfriend, Endo-san.

I was surprised to see her walking toward me.

Her flashy golden appearance reminded me of middle school Endo-san.

But now, that doesn't matter.

“I was waiting for you. I thought since you're doing your teaching practicum, I'd get to see you.”

I have an appointment to meet Haruki later.

But before that, I wanted to talk to Endo-san too.

“Seriously… are you all that free?”

Endo-san showed a clearly disgusted expression.

“I just met Asano earlier. Now it's Fukase's turn.”

“You met Haruki?”

“Curious about what we talked about?”

“Well, yeah. But let's change the place. It's too obvious to talk here.”

“I don't have anything to talk to you about.”

It's 7:30 a.m.

No students have come to school yet, but standing in front of the school gate, we stand out.

“You're meeting Asano later, right? Go already.”

“Did Haruki tell you?”

Without answering my question, Endo-san went through the school gate.

She didn't want to talk to me any further.

But…

“Haruki knew.”

Hearing that, Endo-san stopped in her tracks.

“He knew about your middle school days.”

Yes… Haruki knew what Endo-san was doing behind the scenes in middle school.

“Huh? No way…”

She glared at me and answered.

“Haruki knew.”

But now, I'm not afraid of her.

“Haruki met Senda-senpai by chance in high school. He heard about you from her.”

“Hmph… hah… Fukase, stop lying.”

“It's not a lie.”

“Even if Senda said something, would you believe someone like him? Asano probably thinks the worst of Senda.”

“That may be true. But you've been with Haruki for seven years, right? If you spent that much time with him, there must have been moments when he glimpsed your true feelings.”

Endo-san, who had been glaring at me, looked away and lowered her eyes.

I couldn't see her expression clearly, but…

“No… that can't be…”

She was clearly shaken.

When she exposed my past, Endo-san was confident.

This is the first time I've seen her so rattled.

Seeing her like that, I think she's starting to realize Haruki saw through her true feelings too.

“Then… why did Asano, why did Haruki… stay with me all this time…?”

“I don't know.”

I really don't know.

I wonder that too.

Why did Haruki…?

“Anyway, that's all I wanted to say.”

That was the one thing I wanted to tell Endo-san.

I don't really know how Haruki feels now.

I want him to look my way.

But it's probably true he once cared deeply for Endo-san.

I wanted to make her realize that she betrayed him.

“Why… did you know…”

Endo-san still stood there, shaken, frozen in place.

I turned my back on her and headed to the park where I was supposed to meet Haruki.