Chapter 36: Feelings

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Translator: Soafp

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[Shiho PoV]

In Haruki's room, the two of us faced each other—me and Endo-san.

“Wow, that was really a masterpiece back then, wasn't it?”

Endo-san, looking at me standing in front of her, spoke eloquently about past events… and I shuddered.

“You think so too, right, Fukase?”

Her eyes wide open, she passionately spoke about what she had done.

“A toy… you say…?”

I didn't quite understand the meaning of the word Endo-san used to describe it.

“It's always been boring, you know. That boredom, that thirst in the heart, is satisfied by… such an existence.”

“So you mean Haruki was that…?”

Seeing Endo-san smile as she spoke of the past, I was filled with fear.

…And I thought.

This person is abnormal.

Clearly not ordinary.

That someone like her had been with Haruki all this time…

“What's wrong, Fukase? You seem pretty calm even after hearing my story.”

I wasn't calm at all.

My mind was about to panic.

I took a deep breath to calm myself, and silence fell between us.

“Did you do something to Miwa and Tamiyasan disappearing at the same time?”

After organizing my slightly clearer thoughts, I asked.

“No. Tamiya-san confessed to the school about her relationship with Tatsumi, and that led to that outcome. Tamiya-san, being a teacher, faced dismissal or resignation. Tatsumi probably transferred schools because his parents found out.”

Endo-san continued, calling them fools, answering without hiding any part of the past.

“Well, thanks to that, I didn't have to handle the cleanup myself.”

The “cleanup” meant she had intended to silence Tamiya-san and Miwa by some method.

From Endo-san's past bold actions I had heard earlier, imagining what terrible means she might have used… I didn't even want to think about it.

My body trembled.

The truth was becoming clearer and clearer… and watching Endo-san talk happily, my anger grew.

“Why did you put the invitation to Kaisei High School into my mailbox…? For what purpose…?”

Having heard about Endo-san from Tamiya-san and Senda-senpai, I began to sense that she might have been scheming something outrageous behind the scenes.

But this part, I didn't understand.

Why did she put the invitation to the Kaisei High School cultural festival in my mailbox?

Because of that, I was able to talk a little with Haruki, who had cut ties with me.

“Ah… whatever. I forgot.”

Though she had been so talkative just moments ago, she became evasive with this question.

My breath grew rough with tension and anger.

Taking a deep breath to calm myself again, I looked Endo-san in the eyes and got to the core.

“Endo-san… did you… like Haruki?”

Although she described Haruki as a toy to dispel boredom and quench her heart's thirst…

I felt a bit that she acted out of liking him as a man, wanting to monopolize him.

What Endo-san had done was objectively unforgivable.

But… if she liked Haruki, desperately wanting him beside her, and acted on those feelings…

Would I have the right to blame her?

“Hah, haha… what? Like? Me… liking Asano?”

She called Haruki, her lover, by his surname ‘Asano,' and I felt a chill down my spine.

“No way. Did you think I liked Asano after hearing what I just said?”

Her smile vanished, and her glare became murderous.

“He…Haruki Asano , is a toy to me. Nothing more, nothing less.”

After hearing that… my hesitation was gone.

Maybe Endo-san was the same as me?

Maybe she made mistakes because we were both young?

But… no.

Endo-san had a more adult way of thinking than us.

Only her way was terrifyingly immature, cunning, and extreme.

“Endo-san…”

I immediately stepped up to her and stared back.

“Nice expression, Fukase. It's tempting.”

Though she should have sensed my anger, Endo-san didn't budge at all.

“Break up…”

“Huh? What?”

I'd reached my limit.

My fists clenched naturally.

My whole body trembled, tears spilling out because I was sad, frustrated, and helpless.

“Break up with Haruki!”

“Why? What I do is my business, right?”

“That selfishness caused wounds in everyone's hearts!”

Endo-san seemed to have almost no remorse.

She paid no attention to my words or attitude.

“Haha. Don't misunderstand, Fukase. It's true my actions stirred things up, but all the causes are you. Your backbiting, your weak heart, your dirty possessiveness created this situation.”

“I know that! I know!!”

I understood. Even if I was cleverly used, I was the cause from the start.

I understood that well and wasn't making excuses.

But only this person… Endo-san… I couldn't forgive.

“When Asano told me he ran into you at a mixer, I was disgusted. You acted all calm, like it was old news. He's too kind, just an idiot maybe.”

“Haruki is just kind! Not an idiot!”

Yes, Haruki was just kind.

When they met again at the mixer, he chose his words carefully to make sure I wouldn't worry about the past. He cared for me.

And probably… cared for Endo-san too.

“Good for you, Fukase. You thought you were 100% at fault, but suddenly the real culprit was found, and you can dump all the blame on me.”

“I'm not thinking that! Everyone had faults. But we regret, reflect, and are trying to move forward.”

Senda-senpai, Miwa, Tamiya-san—all suffered.

And surely… Haruki too.

“Endo-san, who only wanted to satisfy her desires, betrayed Haruki the most!”

“I don't care. I don't care how Asano thinks of me.”

“Then break up! Break up with Haruki! Don't get near him anymore!”

Losing control of my rising emotions, I grabbed Endo-san's collar and shouted loudly.

No matter what I said with tears, she seemed unaffected, and a hollow feeling welled up inside me.

“…Yeah, whatever. Fine, if that's what you want, I'll break up with him.”

Hearing those words, all my strength drained away.

I let go of her collar, stunned.

“What? Surprised by my answer?”

“Y-You called Haruki a toy earlier. Why are you so calm about it now?”

“If you keep playing with the same toy, you get bored, right? I've been with Asano for about seven years.”

Seven years… I'd been with Haruki for ten.

Still, I never once felt bored with him.

I only wanted to be with him more, to be his special one.

That feeling grew stronger every day.

“Asano doesn't seem to hate you. Maybe you two can rebuild your relationship.”

“Wait!”

I grabbed Endo-san's arm as she was passing by to leave the living room.

If what I heard about her past actions was true, I couldn't just let her go.

She might still be planning something terrible, and more tragedy could await.

“What? Let go.”

“What are you thinking?”

“Huh? What about?”

“Will you really break up with Haruki?”

“I told you I would!”

Endo-san's mood worsened with my question, and she raised her voice.

“Don't get near Haruki anymore.”

“Shut up!”

She roughly shook off my arm.

Her openly bad mood made her seem somewhat irrational.

“You can do whatever you want with Asano. Want me to give you advice? Maybe tell you his favorite position? I was the one who took his virginity—”

A dry slap echoed through the room.

Before Endo-san could finish, blood rushed to my head again.

Without realizing it, I had struck her hard on the cheek.

“Ah… haha. Nice expression, Fukase.”

Endo-san smiled, seemingly entertained by my anger and sadness.

This woman was definitely abnormal.

But… I must not just dismiss her like that.

Studying psychology at university, working with kids from various backgrounds in free schools and tutoring, I had learned something.

She might have some kind of mental trauma in her past.

Whether it was from home or school, Endo-san's heart might be…

“Endo-san… how was it spending seven years with Haruki?”

“Huh? What's that?”

I frowned, and Endo-san turned her back and started walking away.

As if saying there was nothing more to talk about.

“Wait, Endo-san. Haruki surely—”

I hesitated a bit and then followed Endo-san out of the living room.

At the entrance, I caught sight of her standing still.

At the same time, my eyes caught the owner of this room.

When had he been there?

Had he overheard my conversation with Endo-san?

“Seina…”

Seeing Haruki's sad expression as he looked at Endo-san was unbearably painful for me.

What kind of face was Endo-san making now?

I couldn't see her expression since I only saw her back.