Chapter 21: Self-Transformation

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Translator: Soafp

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[Aoi PoV]

“Miyano-san, what do you want to eat next?”

“Ah… yes, I… anything is fine.”

The four of us—me, Yamato, Toru, and… Hayami-senpai—were going around the school festival together.

“Hayami-senpai, you actually eat quite a lot, don't you?”

“Yeah, I do. And you, Murase-kun, eat less than you look like you would.”

Just a little while ago, I had been enjoying the festival with Yamato, having fun…

But then Hayami-senpai asked, “Would it be alright if I joined you?”

There was no way I could say no…

After that, we went around, covering all the rows of festival stalls.

It felt a bit awkward at first with Hayami-senpai joining us, but in the end, it was fun.

Yamato seemed brighter today, like he used to be… and I even found myself looking forward a little to the after-festival party later.

“By the way, Miyano-san, are you interested in the student council?”

“Huh… no, not really.”

“I see. Actually, the student council is short on people right now, so they're looking for capable students. I thought you and Murase-kun would be a good fit.”

“I don't really have a reason to join either.”

The student council, huh…

If Yamato were to join, I might have wanted to try it too…

“Miyano-san, do you want to go into the haunted house together?”

“Ah, yes.”

I had been a bit nervous around Hayami-senpai, but she was kind, attentive… truly a wonderful person.

It didn't take long at all for me to feel comfortable around her.

After that, the four of us enjoyed the festival to the fullest.

It really was a fun time.

And then came the after-festival event.

So many students were dancing the folk dance with the people they liked or their friends, and even the onlookers were all enjoying this moment.

I glanced sideways at Yamato standing next to me.

There was something about the folk dance… a tradition? A superstition?

I didn't have the courage to ask him, but… I wanted to dance with him… I found myself hoping he might ask me instead…

“Oh, right—it's your birthday, Miyano-san. Happy birthday.”

Hayami-senpai said that to me with a gentle smile.

“Thank you very much.”

She always ranked at the top academically, was well-liked, trusted by both the student council and teachers, and even kind to a junior like me whom she had just met today.

Even though we had only spent a few hours together, I had already begun to admire her.

“Ah… high school life is almost over…”

She murmured that, sounding a little lonely.

It was already autumn, and the third-years would soon be facing university entrance exams.

It made sense she'd feel uneasy, but I had always seen her as someone bright, positive, and relied upon by everyone…

So hearing her say that felt a bit unexpected.

“I've never danced even once…”

As she said that, she turned her gaze toward Yamato.

“Since we're here, want to dance the folk dance?”

Tension ran through my whole body.

Hayami-senpai was inviting Yamato…?

She wanted to dance with him…?

Does that mean she… likes him…?

“I'm not dancing. I'm not interested in that kind of thing.”

Yamato replied bluntly, and I felt relieved.

From the way he spoke, maybe he didn't even know the meaning behind this folk dance.

“I-I'll pass too! It's embarrassing!”

Toru hadn't even been invited, but he hurriedly spoke up anyway.

“I see… that's too bad.”

I still remember the faint shadow in her expression.

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“Um… Hayami-senpai… about earlier, during the folk dance…”

After the festival ended, as we were about to head home, Senpai and I were waiting for Yamato and Toru—it was just the two of us.

“You mean when I invited Yamato-kun?”

I swallowed hard.

“Y-yes… um, could it be that you… like Yamato…?”

I waited nervously for her answer.

It was only a few seconds, but my heart was filled with fear.

If someone like her became my rival in love, there would be no way I could win.

“It's okay. I don't have anyone I like.”

Her eyes looked strangely distant.

“You and Yamato-kun are childhood friends, right?”

“Yes… Yamato has always been really smart, admired by everyone, and very dependable…”

“I see. So that's why you like him.”

Hearing that, I would normally have tried to dodge the question, but…

“I like him… I really do… I've always loved him…”

For once, the truth came out honestly.

“So… you like him because he's capable?”

“N-no, that's not it! It's not like that—I've always…”

“Always what? Because he's smart? Admired? Dependable? …And that's why you fell for him.”

W-what…?

“T-that's not it! He's always been kind to me! He helps me with my studies too!”

“So he was convenient for you?”

Why…? Why is she saying this…?

“Th-that's not… true…”

The senpai I had admired just moments ago…

Why does she suddenly seem so frightening…?

“Really?”

I couldn't argue back against her hollow gaze.

“I… really… do love him…”

Because he's smart?

Because he's admired?

Because he's dependable?

Because he's kind?

“He was the second person in the school's history to get a perfect top score on the entrance exam. That's incredible. I've always been confident in my academics, but I could never imagine scoring perfectly on this school's exam. He truly stood out… until recently.”

“Until recently…”

That sounded like the past—like, to her, Yamato was no longer exceptional.

“He's definitely talented. But you know, the heart is a double-edged sword. Just one wrong turn, and everything can change…”

…I don't understand.

I don't understand what she's trying to say.

“If Yamato-kun stopped being the person you idealize… could you still say you love him?”

“I—I can!”

“Even if he were just an ordinary person?”

“I'd still love him!”

“Even if he became irresponsible?”

“It wouldn't matter!”

“Even if he… committed a crime?”

At that moment… anger surged up from deep within me.

What is she saying?

What is she even talking about…?

“I'm sorry, Miyano-san. That was just me taking it out on you.”

“Huh…?”

She placed a hand on my shoulder and smiled gently—her usual kind smile—and slowly, my heart began to calm down.

“Recently, with exam prep and helping out with school events… a lot has been going on… I've been a bit on edge. I'm really sorry.”

I was surprised to see her bow her head so deeply.

“N-no, it's okay.”

Taking it out on me…

It was unexpected.

Even someone as amazing as her had worries and inner conflicts.

“I'll head home first.”

“Ah, okay…”

We had planned to meet up with Yamato and the others and go home together, but…

With her back turned as she was about to leave, she continued:

“You know, I actually wanted to try being in the student council and do all sorts of things. But… nothing in this world is truly fair.”

Her back looked so lonely.

“Personally, I'm rooting for you, Miyano-san. Both in school and in love. And one last piece of advice from a senpai—”

She turned back with a bright smile.

“Do your best for yourself. Not for someone else, but for your own sake.”

I didn't understand what Hayami-senpai really meant as she walked away so cheerfully.

But… doing my best for myself… that part felt true.

Instead of waiting for Yamato to notice me, maybe I could become someone strong enough to guide him…

“The student council, huh…”

A few days later, I joined the student council.

I wanted to change myself.

I later heard through the grapevine that Hayami-senpai had been accepted into a national university.

In the end, the day of the school festival was both the first and the last time I ever spoke with her.