Chapter 12: At the Edge of Despair…And Then…

Reading Settings

Translator: Soafp

---

A bankruptcy buried under a mountain of debt.

Life suddenly became difficult. My mom increased her working hours, and I decided to start a part-time job too, but my dad—perhaps too shocked—didn't work at all, spending his days sunk in gloom.

The only saving grace was that my high school tuition was waived. Since I had entered at the top of my class, I was treated as an outstanding student. I was really glad I had worked so hard on my studies.

“Long time no see, Yamato-kun.”

“Da… Daisuke-san.”

Just after the high school entrance ceremony, when I was thinking about finding a part-time job, Daisuke-san suddenly came to visit our home, which startled me.

“Ah… my dad isn't home right now…”

“That's fine. Today I came to see you. This is sudden, but Yamato-kun—what do you think of Aoi?”

“Eh… th-that's…”

At his abrupt question, I was at a loss for words, but Daisuke-san calmly continued.

“I heard about your father's company. That's unfortunate. Life must be tough from here on, isn't it?”

“Y-yes…”

He already knew about my dad's company going bankrupt. Where had he heard it?

“I inherited the company from my father when I was young. Eventually, I plan for my daughter Aoi to do the same.”

Daisuke-san's company handled various businesses, but it was mainly known for manufacturing and selling medical equipment.

“For Aoi's lifelong partner, I want someone excellent. What about you?”

“M-me…?”

Aoi's partner…? Did he mean fiancé…?

Am I… excellent?

I take pride in my academics now, but…

“Your father was truly excellent. It's unfortunate what's happened now, though…”

What was that…?

There was something unsettling hidden in his words.

“You… held my dad in high regard, didn't you…?”

“Of course. That's why it's such a pity.”

A terrifying suspicion crossed my mind.

“My dad's company… it was in the same industry as yours, wasn't it…?”

“That's right.”

“At first, it seemed to be on track, doing well. But gradually, the performance started declining…”

“…That's true.”

Was this the dignity of a corporate president speaking…?

“Daisuke-san… you didn't think well of my dad, did you…?”

“Maybe not.”

His calm, matter-of-fact attitude… filled me with fear.

“…I digress. What I want is for you to prove your excellence.”

“Prove…?”

“Yes. If you can prove yourself in this time of financial hardship, then I won't mind you coming over again, and I'd even welcome you as Aoi's partner.”

“Even if you say welcome…”

It was clear he knew I had feelings for Aoi.

“Aoi's feelings matter too…”

“That's between the two of you.”

“So… how exactly am I supposed to prove it…?”

“Over the long term… let's say, getting accepted into a top university. If you demonstrate your true ability, I don't think that's unrealistic.”

A top university…

Of course, I wanted to go. I had promised Aoi too.

But…

“I… I'll have to start working part-time now too…”

“I'm sure. Balancing that with your studies will be tough. Even so—can you do it for Aoi?”

The only time I could spend with Aoi now was at school.

If I refused here… maybe after graduation, I'd never be with her again.

“F-fine. I understand.”

I had to prove myself no matter what.

During high school, I had to earn money for college while also building the academic strength to win the exam battle.

“U-um… about this, you won't tell Aoi, right…?”

“I haven't told her. Or about your father, either. You don't want to worry her, do you?”

Of course, I didn't want her to worry.

But more than that… if my dad's bankruptcy had something to do with Daisuke-san…

“Thank you for your time. I'll be supporting you quietly.”

As I watched his back disappear, unease consumed me.

---

“A dream…?”

I had seen a long dream.

The fun days after meeting Aoi…

Akane-san… Daisuke-san… Toru…

“Noon already… huh.”

It seemed I had fallen asleep. The clock had passed twelve, and at school right now, the students were probably attending classes with the festival's afterglow still lingering.

“The fever… is gone.”

I checked the thermometer under my arm—36.6℃, normal. No more headache or fatigue. But still…

“Ugh… Aoi…”

Ten days ago, at the cultural festival. All the money I'd saved from working part-time vanished. Even so, I wanted to give Aoi a present, so I went to school.

But at the afterparty, seeing Aoi and Toru together… it felt like my heart was dropped into an abyss.
On top of that, even Daisuke-san was there…

Toru had always liked Aoi. And now Aoi… had accepted his feelings.

The proof of excellence Daisuke-san had demanded… I hadn't managed it.

But Toru had.

Was he recognized by Daisuke-san…?

Mutual feelings between Aoi and Toru. A relationship blessed by her father.

“I… I still can't let go of these feelings…”

Hayami-senpai had taken care of me, listened to me. That day, I had felt lighter. I had even asked her to take care of disposing of Aoi's birthday present. I had resolved to move on.

“…What an idiot I am.”

Back then, sick with a high fever and shaken by one shock after another, I pushed Aoi away with harsh words.
My love was already over. It should have been settled.

And yet… Aoi's words still left me clinging to a faint hope.

“I… want to be with you, Yamato…”

“Yamato, promise… we'll go to the same university, right?”

Was it just that she wanted to stay together as friends, since we were childhood friends?
Or… was there another reason…?

“Yamato… are you ready? It's about time…”

“Yeah… I know. Go on ahead.”

My mom, holding a suitcase and a large backpack, called out to me before stepping out the front door.

I shouldered my own backpack and was about to follow her when I glanced around my room one last time.
My desk, chair, bed, and an empty bookshelf.

Everything else had been cleared away neatly.

In the living room, my dad sat slumped on the floor, head hanging.

“Dad… if you don't have a job lined up, at least go to Hello Work or something.”

He didn't answer, even when I spoke to him.

“You used to be brilliant… You can do it again. …So… take care.”

Even though he had stolen my money… maybe I could at least worry about him this once.

Right after my parents' divorce was decided, my mom had gone to city hall to file the paperwork. When she brought it up, my dad had listened quietly and accepted it without protest.

“Yamato… I'm sorry.”

As I was about to leave through the front door, I heard my father's frail voice from behind me.

“Take care of yourself…”

He had been a worthless father, but the seventeen years we spent together weren't all bad.
Of course, there were memories of us laughing together, fun times we shared.

Without replying to him, I held back the tears that threatened to spill over and left the house I had grown up in.

---

“Yamato… are you ready?”

“…Yeah.”

In front of the apartment building, my mother was waiting for me.

She had managed, through connections, to secure a full-time job. Along with her divorce from my father, we were moving into a small apartment close to her new workplace.

“Yamato… I'm so sorry. Really… for everything that's happened.”

“No… there's nothing for you to apologize for, Mom.”

At first, I had been angry at her for saying nothing to my father after he became unemployed. But now… I no longer had the energy to be angry.

We boarded a train to head toward our new home.

It wasn't as if we were moving to another prefecture. It was far from here, yes, but with a three-hour trip by transferring trains, we could come back to this area.

“I hope your new school will be a good place for you.”

“Ah… yeah.”

From the new home, it was too far to keep commuting to my current high school. Luckily, a transfer school was quickly found that would accept me. It was a private school, which meant higher tuition, but my mother promised she would handle it.

The academic level there was much lower than my current school, so earning the credits to graduate would probably be easier.

But transferring also meant, of course… that I would be separated from Aoi. That alone… made me hesitate to move and transfer.

Pathetic of me.

As if there had ever been another choice…

As if I hadn't already needed to let go…

“Yamato… about university…”

“Mom… I know already…”

Yeah… I wouldn't be able to go to university. That was something I had already accepted.

My promise with Aoi… in the end… I couldn't keep it. We would part ways just like this…

“Wait, Yamato.”

A voice stopped me as I walked toward the station.

“Daisuke-san…”

When I turned, there stood Aoi's father.

---

“I heard you were moving… so I came to see you.”

Daisuke looked at me with a solemn expression.

“Miyano-san…”

When my mother noticed him, she bowed politely, then quickly turned away and started walking.

“Let's go, Yamato.”

“Mom… please, go on ahead to the station.”

At my words, she looked back at Daisuke once, then quietly nodded and walked off alone.

“So, what are you going to do now?”

“What do you mean…? I don't know.”

His question made me feel a flicker of irritation.

“Yamato… I had expectations for you, you know.”

Expectations…?

What was this man even talking about…?

“I thought… you would overcome adversity. That's what I believed.”

Overcome adversity…?

Me…?

“I guess… I wasn't strong enough for that…”

“And Aoi… you've given up on her, then?”

What the hell is that supposed to mean…?

Given up or not… there was never a choice for me to make.

“I thought you and Aoi were a good match… but I guess I was mistaken.”

“Why are you… saying this now…?”

When he had been the one keeping us apart…

“Well, Aoi already has a fiancé.”

“Fi… fiancé? Aoi… does?”

“Yes. You know him well, don't you? Toru Murase. He's her fiancé.”

Aoi and Toru… engaged?

The word went beyond “boyfriend,” and my mind went blank.

“No way…”

“Of course, both Toru and Aoi agreed to it.”

I had been too naïve.

“They'll go to the same university.”

Aoi's words… telling me she wanted to stay with me…

“They'll grow their love as lovers.”

I thought maybe the folk dance, maybe her closeness with Toru… was just some mistake…

“And afterward, they'll get married.”

Somewhere inside, I still held a faint hope… that I might have a chance…

“Aoi and Toru will have children, and build a happy family.”

Aoi… and Toru… with children.

Aoi, in Toru's arms…

“Please… stop.”

Even if I transferred and we were separated, I had thought I could always come back to see her. Just minutes ago, I'd been clinging to that sweet delusion.

“I thought you…”

But standing beside Aoi… was never something I could do anymore. It was already too late. It was Toru who stood at her side, not me…

“Even after hearing this, you still—”

“SHUT UP!!”

I shouted, drowning out his voice, and bolted.

I don't want to hear it anymore.

I don't want to know.

Not about Aoi and Toru.

Not about their bright future.

[Yamato-kun… from now on, please, always… always stay close to Aoi.]

Akane's words replayed in my mind.

“I'm sorry… Akane-san… I'm sorry.”

The promise, university, my childhood friend Aoi, my best friend Toru—

I didn't care anymore!

I didn't want to think about any of it!

My heart was completely shattered.

In utter despair, I transferred schools and disappeared from my childhood friend's side.