Chapter 4

Reading Settings

Translator: Soafp

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“—Reita-kun!”

“What?”

“Let's kiss!”

“…Huh?”

When we were kids, Maaya had by far the most broken sense of personal space out of all my childhood friends.

“Listen, Maaya. Kisses are something you do with someone you like.”

“I like you though, Reita-kun?”

“Not that kind of like.”

“Then what kind?”

“Beats me. I don't know either.”

“What's that supposed to mean?”

Even back then, she'd say things like wanting to kiss, bathe together, or sleep while hugging…

It was the kind of behavior that made you worry about her future.

And it didn't stop even after we entered elementary school.

“Reita-kun! Let's hold hands on the way home!”

Her requests became a bit milder, but she still misunderstood boundaries.

Maybe I was also at fault for accepting it, but she was just too innocent for me to push her away harshly…

“I told you, stuff like that is for someone you—”

“I like you. Here, hold hands.”

“…”

I always got swept up by her momentum.

And then, when we became middle schoolers—

When I lost my memory, the one who cried the most was Maaya.

She didn't care how messy her face got—she just cried her heart out.

She must have truly cared about me.

…And yet, I was the one who pushed her away the hardest.

“Don't come near me anymore. I hate you.”

I said the cruelest words she never should have had to hear.

Even if I wanted to keep her from getting caught up in bad rumors, I didn't have to go as far as saying I hated her.

“Because I lost my memory” isn't an excuse.

I hurt her deeply.

And after that, we never saw each other again.

---

“One day~ in the forest~ a little kitty—♪”

As promised, we ended up at karaoke.

In a hazy state of mind, I watched Maaya as she sang.

Standing in front of everyone, she somehow looked more grown-up than before.

She used to be shy, so seeing her like this made me realize how much she'd changed without me noticing.

Four years…

It sounded short, but it was a long time.

We had both changed completely.

But the song she chose—about a forest kitty.

In that sense, she hadn't changed at all.

If anything, it made me feel a little relieved.

“Wooo! Maaya-chan, so cute!”

The guys were eating it up.

Her soft, gentle vibe and the way she sang so earnestly made her incredibly charming.

Even I couldn't help but watch her.

So this is what they mean by “cute is justice,” huh.

Was she doing it on purpose, or was it natural…?

Not being able to tell—that was just like Maaya.

“—Phew, I was so nervous…”

After finishing her song, she sat down and muttered that to no one in particular.

By coincidence—or maybe not—she sat right next to me.

I tried my best not to make eye contact, but that only made things more awkward.

I wonder… what does Maaya think of me now?

Is she still angry about what happened back then?

Or has it been so long that she's already forgotten?

Either way, there's no way she thinks well of me.

Now that I've regained my memories, I understand.

There's no way someone could be okay after being told something like that by a childhood friend they were so close to.

If it were me, I'd probably be bedridden for half a year.

“Maaya-chan, you're really good at singing!”

“Ah, thank you…”

Yamada, sitting two seats away from me, leaned in close—close enough for their shoulders to touch—as he casually started chatting her up.

Maaya responded with a slightly uncomfortable smile.

…Seriously, why did she even come?

Was she trying to socialize since it was a new class?

Or did she just join on a whim?

After four years apart, I couldn't really read what she was thinking anymore.

“Hey, Maaya-chan, you don't have a boyfriend, right? What's your type?”

“Huh? Um… maybe someone cool?”

“Oh, then that's totally me! Just kidding, hahaha!”

“Ahaha…”

Yamada continued trying to flirt with her.

…Hmm. Not a bad approach, but as a pickup attempt, it's second-rate.

If it were me, I'd start by focusing on the other person rather than myself—

…What am I even thinking?

That's not why I came here.

I came to make sure no weird guy got close to Maaya.

It's not even atonement—just unnecessary meddling.

But since I'm here, I might as well do something.

“Hey—Okabe. Got a second?”

Just as it looked like Yamada might get a little too handsy, I quickly grabbed the tablet controller and spoke to her.

Maaya looked surprised for a moment, but soon smiled and replied, “What is it?”

“Can you show me how to use this?”

I already knew how, but I didn't know what else to say.

“Ah, sure. So, you press here like this—”

As she explained, she leaned in closer to me.

A faint, sweet scent brushed past my nose, and at the same time, something soft pressed against my arm.

…She's way too close.

Her chest is literally touching me.

It reminded me of how she used to be.

Isn't her guard way too low? Is she really okay…?

More than that, I was confused by how casually she was acting.

I expected at least some kind of rejection from her…

…But that's probably just because Maaya is kind to everyone.

Even if she's angry inside, she'd never show it.

She's the kind of person who would forgive someone without hesitation.

That's exactly why I can't misunderstand this.

The fact that I hurt her is still there, inside her.

I can't let myself feel forgiven just because of her kindness.

“—And that's about it. Got it?”

When she looked up at me—our eyes suddenly met.

In her round eyes, I could clearly see my own reflection.

For a moment, it felt like time had stopped.

We both froze…

…and then quickly looked away at the same time.

Maybe… she's at least a little aware of me too?

It felt strange.

Until now, whenever our eyes met, all I felt was guilt.

Just the weight of having made her cry.

But now that my memories have returned, something else has mixed in.

A quiet sense of nostalgia spread through my chest—

a longing for a time I can never return to.

The days I spent with my childhood friends were irreplaceable.

Sitting next to Maaya now only made that feeling grow stronger.

But… there's no going back.

Right now, we're nothing to each other.

It's all part of a past that disappeared along with my memories.

…Or at least, it should be.

So what am I even doing here…?

Feeling like I might lose myself again, just like back then,

I decided—for now—to just sing.