Chapter 23

Reading Settings

Translator: Soafp

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[Shizuno Pov]

Rin and I were relaxing with tea at a café across from the sweets shop, watching Maaya and Reita.

“Watching those two kinda makes me want to fall in love too…”

Rin muttered as she lazily stirred the ice in her iced tea. Just a moment ago she looked ready to jump out of her seat when Maaya tried to feed Reita cake, yet now she sounded oddly sentimental. As always, Rin’s emotions were all over the place.

“Then why don’t you? You’re cute, Rin. If you wanted to, you could date anytime.”

“Well… I don’t wanna go out with someone unless I actually like them.”

“You don’t have anyone you like?”

“Nope. Not right now.”

So that means she used to, right? Maybe Rin liked Reita too after all.

We never really talked much about romance among us childhood friends, so I never truly knew what everyone felt inside. But Rin was close with him too—maybe not as much as Maaya, but still close enough that it wouldn’t be strange.

“What about you, Shizu? Still not interested in romance?”

“Yeah. Not interested at all.”

“Man… what a waste. You’re seriously beautiful, you know.”

“Even if you say that, I’m not interested, so it can’t be helped.”

I said that calmly while taking a sip of my tea, but—

That was a lie.

Every word I just said was a lie. Saying I had no interest in love was completely false.

I… like the others, had fallen in love with Reita.

But I only realized those feelings after everything was already too late.

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I used to think love had nothing to do with me.

Back then, whenever people talked about who they liked or which boy was cute, I always thought it was pointless.

Elementary school romance was just child’s play.

Even when my friends got excited over love talk, I stayed on the outside, quietly listening. Of course, I had never once had someone I liked.

I prioritized what I had to do.

Rather than being swayed by unnecessary emotions, I believed it was far more worthwhile to work toward becoming my ideal self.

That’s how I lived.

But only after losing him did I realize—

I had been in love all along.

When I found out Reita had lost his memory, my chest hurt so badly it felt like it would tear apart.

I, who almost never cried, found my eyes wet before I knew it.

That cold pain when he looked at me like I was a stranger… just remembering it still burns in my chest.

At first, I thought it was just because he was my childhood friend.

But as time passed, the feelings I couldn’t suppress kept growing.

I wanted to talk to him again.

I wanted to laugh with him again.

I wanted to—

That’s when I finally realized.

This was love.

Of course, by the time I realized it, everything was already too late.

Standing in front of the hollow version of him, I didn’t know what to do.

Normally, I might have been able to stay calm and make the right decision.

But once I became aware of my feelings, I couldn’t find an answer for how to face him.

So I chose to stay true to myself.

I left him to Maaya and the others, and decided to do what only I could do.

I devoted myself to punishing those who tried to take advantage of him after he lost his memory.

In the end, that decision was wrong.

I couldn’t stop the rumors.

I couldn’t find the culprit.

At some point, even Maaya and the others lost their connection with him, and he fell alone into a deep darkness.

I did try to reach out and save him.

But by the time I realized everything, he had already sunk too far into darkness.

And as someone who stood on the opposite side of that, I couldn’t be by his side.

And just like that, our bond as childhood friends—

and my love—

all became things of the past.

All that remained in my heart was a quiet, lingering sense of loss… and a faint feeling of self-blame.

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“—Shizu? Hey, we should get ready to leave.”

Rin waved her hand in front of me, snapping me back to reality.

“Ah… sorry.”

I had gotten lost in memories again.

I drained the rest of my tea in one go.

As we paid and prepared to leave, my thoughts began to wander once more.

What do I feel about him now…?

The feelings I thought I had buried deep inside are starting to surface again.

Honestly, I don’t know.

I had already cut them off once.

But now that I suspect his memories might have returned, something inside me has quietly begun to stir again.

For the record, I’m not completely certain about his memories.

I just feel about eighty percent sure they’ve come back.

Unlike Maaya and the others, I had a few chances to interact with Reita even after we drifted apart.

Most of those were just me lecturing him one-sidedly, but the biggest reason is how differently he treated me compared to before.

Not long ago, he used to look genuinely annoyed.

Every time he clicked his tongue at me, it felt like my chest was being squeezed.

But I didn’t want to compromise my principles, so I never treated him differently.

…Though, maybe I did have a personal desire for him not to lose his way.

In any case, there’s a high chance his memories have returned.

I can more or less guess why he hasn’t told us.

Knowing him, he probably doesn’t want to give us false hope.

Even though he doesn’t need to worry about that.

Right now, he’s facing his past and desperately trying to reclaim himself.

Even while people around him say whatever they want, he keeps putting in honest effort.

I can feel his strong determination to become himself again.

He’ll come back.

I’m sure of it.

And when that happens…

Will I… fall in love with him again?