Chapter 9: The Naturally Idiot and the Pathetic Idiot

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Translator: Soafp

---

For the past few days, I've often found myself thinking about my childhood friend.

The last time I saw her, she looked exhausted after being held accountable for what she had done.

I haven't contacted her since we parted ways, and I don't even know how to reach her.

Maybe I keep remembering her because I told Amanatsu that old story.

Or maybe it's because some of Amanatsu's mannerisms occasionally resemble my childhood friend's.

Thinking about that, I sat on the sofa in my room, drank coffee, picked up my phone, and sent a message with flick input.

Nice to meet you.

Hatsukade-kun! I'm so happy you sent the first message! I didn't expect you to be the type who actually keeps in touch with people!

I could easily picture you agonizing for hours over whether to message me. That would be a loss of opportunity, so I sent it first.

…Sorry, I'm suddenly not happy at all anymore.

What an awful thing to say in response to my kindness.

Did she seriously expect something romantic to come from me?

Let me make this clear: if Amanatsu showed even the slightest sign of seeing me as more than a friend, I intended to crush it immediately.

Changing the subject… You know, you treated me to bread the other day?

What about it?

So I thought I should thank you somehow… Is there any food you like, Hatsukade-kun?

She was crossing the line already.

There's a bakery near your house that makes good egg tarts. Buy me some. It's open in the morning, so please do. Here's the store's URL.

Before she could start talking about making me a lunchbox, I sent the message and put my phone on the table.

My stance wouldn't change from here on out.

I didn't care what anyone thought of me.

No matter what happened, I was still me.

I took a sip of my cooled coffee.

Its elegant, sharp acidity and rich, wild bitterness seeped across my tongue.

Heh. Ordering Kilimanjaro beans from Tanzania had been the right choice after all.

---

Before homeroom the next morning, Shinonome was still wearing her usual obliging smile.

Looking around the classroom, I saw girls from other groups glancing at her and quietly laughing among themselves when they thought she wouldn't notice.

—Treating someone like a landmine. The phrase suited her perfectly.

“Hatsukade, I want to ask you something.”

A boy with a severe look in his eyes called out to me.

Lately, it felt like more and more people had been looking at me coldly.

Well, after all the things I said about Amanatsu, it made sense that I had earned their hostility.

“What?”

“Tell us who leaked the person Masaki likes.”

The other boys, apparently interested in the subject as well, gathered around, muttering things like, “I want to know too,” and “That's unforgivable.”

“I have no obligation to tell you.”

“Obligation…? That's not the point. When the topic of who Masaki liked came up, only people close to him were there. That means one of them was a traitor. I can't forgive them if they don't even apologize.”

The boys gathered here must have been members of that group.

At the very back stood Katsurama, desperately trying to maintain a straight face.

“I understand how you feel, but I have no obligation to tell you. I'm not your friend.”

“W-We're classmates!”

“Just say we happen to sit at desks in the same classroom.”

The pressure from the boys glaring at me intensified, but no threat would make me cave.

Then Masaki calmly spoke up.

“Come on, it's fine. Anyone can let something slip once in a while.”

“You're okay with that, Masaki?”

“Yeah. I don't want to start a fight over it.”

He said it so casually that the boy arguing back fell silent.

Heh. Popular guys really do have a different kind of composure.

“Still, I don't like Hatsukade either.”

Oh? They still had complaints about me?

The boy pointed a finger at me.

“I'm not saying you're completely in the wrong, but even if it was a misunderstanding, you exposed the person Masaki liked in front of everyone. And Masaki had nothing to do with this. What do you have to say for yourself?”

“Yeah, that's right! Don't just brush it off. Apologize to Masaki properly!”

They were piling up reasonable-sounding arguments, but they probably just disliked me.

Why not simply say it clearly: I don't like you?

Then, for some reason, Katsurama stepped in.

“M-Masaki's forgiven him, so isn't that enough!?”

He continued talking rapidly.

“I hate this kind of atmosphere. It makes everyone hate each other, and I think of everybody as friends. Hatsukade only said it because of how the conversation was going, right? Masaki says it's fine, so why don't we settle it peacefully, okay?”

As if he were doing me a favor, Katsurama gave me an awkward wink.

I returned it with a broad smile, and he narrowed his eyes in relief.

“Katsurama, if you did something wrong, then apologizing is only natural.”

“Huh!?”

“You're wrong.”

I couldn't help feeling exasperated as Katsurama stood there speechless.

Seriously, how pathetic.

The other boys shouted, “You're taking his side!?” But this had been my position from the start.

So everyone could hear, I spoke loudly and bowed my head.

“Sorry, Masaki. I did drag you into something unrelated to you. I regret that.”

Masaki gave a wry smile and rubbed the back of his head.

“Haha, I told you, it's fine. Besides, Hatsukade apologized to me privately that day.”

The boys gasped in surprise.

“Whaaat? He did!?”

“Yeah. I didn't think it was something to announce to everyone, so I kept quiet, but it turned out badly. Hatsukade, I'm sorry too.”

As Masaki bowed, the boys awkwardly scratched their cheeks.

I calmly addressed the group, now standing silently.

“You blamed me even though I had apologized. What was it you said people should do when they've done something wrong?”

“…Damn.”

“S-Sorry…”

“Me too…”

With faces like they had bitten into something bitter, they quietly backed down.

By now, the entire class had started watching us.

In the middle of it all, Katsurama alone gave an empty laugh.

“Great, great. I was wrong too. Yeah!”

Then he smiled at Shinonome.

“Shi-chan, you made up with Amanatsu too, so maybe you don't need to worry anymore?”

Katsurama… you had absolutely no sense.

Don't tell someone not to worry about something in front of a crowd when they're clearly worried about it.

Look—Shinonome's face is twitching.

And one more thing: Shinonome still hadn't apologized to me.

So I said it.

“I think she should apologize once in front of everyone.”

Shinonome raised the corners of her eyes resentfully.

Katsurama choked out a strange noise.

I wanted to continue reading my novel, so I sat down and resumed.

---

At lunch break, in front of the rooftop door—which had become our usual spot—Amanatsu, wearing a dead expression, held out a paper bag.

“Here… Egg tarts.”

“Perfect. They sell out pretty quickly if you don't buy them in the morning, so they're hard to get. This is great. Thanks, Amanatsu.”

“…This is completely different from the thank-you I had planned. You look happier than when you talk to me. I want the time I spent staring at Cookpad back.”

Were you really going to make me lunch?

Muttering complaints, Amanatsu spread out her bento. She gave me a resentful look while chewing a piece of fried chicken, then swallowed.

“I know what your personality is like, so it's fine, but… couldn't you respond with a little more humanity?”

“Don't talk about me like I'm some kind of monster. From my perspective, the people in the classroom look like yokai. There was another farce first thing this morning too.”

“Hmm…”

Amanatsu groaned, then looked up at me apologetically.

“Um… about Shi-chan. She seems to be reflecting a lot, and I've forgiven her. So maybe you don't have to keep criticizing her like you did this morning.”

“Are you talking to me?”

“Why are you not aware of it…?”

Amanatsu stared at me in disbelief as I took a commemorative photo of my egg tart.

“Let me be clear: I don't hate or resent anyone. I'm simply not interested in them. As for Shinonome, though, I do think she should hurry up, apologize properly, and draw a line under this. It's a nuisance to be dragged into it one-sidedly.”

Oh, that was a good photo.

Another addition to my collection.

Amanatsu dropped her chopsticks with a sharp clatter. She stared at me, mouth hanging slightly open.

“…Hey, is this that thing you always do again?”

“What thing?”

“Acting like you're not doing anything while helping people!”

“Huh? I don't remember that. Oh, these are extra disposable chopsticks I had in my bag. Use them.”

“That's exactly what I mean!”

With puffed cheeks, Amanatsu murmured, “Thank you,” then snapped the chopsticks apart with unnecessary force.

“Ugh… This is complicated.”

Why was I getting complaints for giving her chopsticks?

Just then, the sound of someone racing up the stairs echoed through the stairwell.

A blonde gyaru who had come running at full speed shouted:

“Hatsukade, stop bullying Shi-chan!”

Sakura Hiiragi stood with her legs apart and looked down at me, saying something completely incomprehensible.

“It's true that Shi-chan did something wrong! But treating her like this any further is excessive!”

Don't reopen a conversation that just ended.

She was an idiot, but a genius at stirring up chaos.

“She hasn't even apologized to me yet, so there's nothing for me to forgive.”

“Huhhh, really!? Then Shi-chan's in the wrong!”

Ugh. My head hurt.

I take it back. I hate this one girl.

“Let me make this clear: you're the one I forgive the least.”

“Me!?”

“Nothing is more troublesome than harm caused without malice.”

“S-Sorry.”

Did she really understand what she had done wrong?

There was no point unless she reflected and looked for what to change.

My prediction: this girl would absolutely repeat the same mistake.

“Huh? Wait, why is Nakina here with you? Weren't you and Hatsukade fighting?”

“Um… we made up.”

“After he said such awful things to you!?”

Hiiragi leaned in to peer at Amanatsu's face.

“Ohooo.”

Amanatsu lowered her face shyly.

“Ugh… Why did Sakura, of all people, figure it out right away…?”

“When did this happen…?”

“Various things happened, and we became friends.”

Hiiragi looked at me with an expression that said, Why this guy?

Right back at you. Why was a rare beast like this so popular? The world had to be broken.

“I see. Well, making up is best, right? Still, Hatsukade, you have some incredible mental strength. Normally, you couldn't calmly eat lunch with someone who confessed to you.”

Said the girl who started eating an onigiri from her drawstring pouch right in front of a boy who hated her.

“Why are you eating with us?”

“Huh? Because we're friends now.”

“What?”

“A friend of a friend is a friend, right?”

What a brainless string of words.

By that logic, her friend network probably stretched to the other side of the planet.

“N-No! Sakura isn't friends with Hatsukade-kun!”

“Why are you jumping in too, Nakina!?”

“Because Hatsukade-kun is a loner with no friends other than me!”

Why was I the one getting stabbed in this conversation?

Well, it was true, so whatever.

Then Hiiragi patted Amanatsu on the head.

“Don't worry. I have a policy of never betraying my friends!”

Says the girl who pushed her into a fake confession.

Though, right—this girl had done it without malice after being egged on by Shinonome.

“Hmm… I trust you, okay?”

“Leave it to me. Besides, Nakina knows I already have my heart set on a darling!”

Oh? She had a boyfriend?

That explained why, despite everyone praising her looks, no one tried to make a move on her.

Then Amanatsu furrowed her brow and muttered:

“But Sakura's boyfriend is imagina—”

Amanatsu whispered something too quietly for me to catch, then weakly shook her head.

“Never mind.”

Hiiragi, the only one in a good mood, turned to me.

“I don't know much about you, Hatsukade. Do you have any hobbies or anything?”

“Nothing in particular… If I had to say, solo food tours and prudent asset management.”

““Asset management!?””

Their voices overlapped.

Hiiragi widened her eyes.

“Do you mean you trade stocks? That sounds kind of cool. Like, staring at a monitor until the exact moment comes, then going all-in with your life savings to make a fortune?”

What, was she an investor who chased charts like a locust swarm?

“I don't gamble. I invest regularly in index funds through dollar-cost averaging. In my minor's account, I automatically invest a fixed amount every month with no emotions involved.”

“…Sorry, was that an incantation?”

Beside the head-tilting Hiiragi, Amanatsu's eyes sparkled far too brightly.

“If I put in my New Year's money too, can I buy all the cosmetics I want every month?”

Realizing there was no point explaining, I took the final bite of my egg tart.

---

Still, why did everyone go on and on about romance?

There were plenty of ways to enjoy life.

To me, dating in high school was basically gambling.

Statistics showed that most couples broke up anyway, so spending resources on it was a waste of time.

After school, I was about to head home, but Amanatsu selfishly asked me to go with her on her first day in the club. So we headed for the clubroom together.

On the way, we heard a few male classmates laughing.

“Honestly, I lost all respect for Shinonome. No matter how much she liked Masaki, making her friend Amanatsu give a fake confession was too much.”

“Her hidden side is way too nasty. That cute act she always puts on was totally fake. It's messed up.”

“Maybe she should just date Hatsukade. They'd be perfect together—both have awful personalities.”

Then they finally noticed me—and Shinonome, who happened to be walking ahead of us.

“Ah, s**t.”

They were the boys who had confronted me that morning.

Masaki was at club practice, so he wasn't here, but Katsurama was. He had remained silent the whole time.

“…”

Shinonome let out a small sound, and Katsurama broke into a cold sweat.

A painful silence fell.

I looked at Katsurama.

He did nothing. He simply stood there, dumbfounded.

I continued toward the clubroom.

Walking past them in silence and passing Shinonome, I caught sight of her pale face.

“…Tch.”

At the tongue click that slipped out, Shinonome's shoulders jumped.

“I said it this morning: I haven't forgiven Shinonome.”

“…”

“But people with nothing to do with it have no right to say anything.”

“…What?”

I declared it to Shinonome, who had drawn out the word in surprise, and to the boys looking at me.

“Amanatsu and I made up, as you can see. You already know about the situation with Masaki. So when uninvolved people keep making noise about it, it makes things awkward between Amanatsu and Masaki. I'd appreciate it if you didn't spread it around any more.”

The boys gossiping behind her back eagerly seized the opportunity.

“If the people involved say so…”

They hurried away.

Katsurama, at the back, looked over his shoulder at me several times before eventually leaving too.

Shinonome looked up at me as though glaring.

“I didn't ask you to help me.”

“I didn't help you. Don't get the wrong idea.”

“Hmph!”

With that parting remark, she walked away too.

Amanatsu poked me lightly from behind.

“What?”

“…Nothing. Let's go.”

With her lips pursed, looking displeased, she stomped off toward the clubroom.

It wasn't like I wanted to get involved either.

I just hated it when people who weren't victims acted self-righteous, as if they had been harmed. That was all. It simply annoyed me.

---

A few days later, as May neared its end, our high school had a special event reserved for first-year students.

An overnight group training camp.

The goal was to learn teamwork by trekking through forest trails over two days and one night.

Basically, it was an event to help new students get to know their classmates.

The groups were decided by lottery.

The boys in my group were Masaki and Katsurama.

And the girls were—

“Heyyy! We've really been crossing paths a lot lately, Hatsukade!”

Hiiragi, who said that nonsense, along with Amanatsu and Shinonome.