Chapter 29 – And So I'm Left Helpless

Reading Settings

Well, when I think about the rose-colored days ahead, the fact we didn't get to meet up for lunch is just a minor blip. Not worth stressing over.

Anyway, guess I should let someone know—I finally got a girlfriend. My very first one. I’m at that age where I just want to brag about it like an idiot.

…

Wait a sec—who the hell am I even supposed to brag to?

Looking at my options, it's not like I can tell my mom or anything.

…

Ah. Right. There's one person who fits the bill. A comrade-in-arms.

Yeah, guess I'll shoot a message to Temari. Kinda rude, but whatever.

“Yo. You're not gonna believe this, but I finally got myself a girlfriend. First time ever.”

“…”

Huh? No reply?

I figured Temari, at the very least, would hit me with a “Congrats” or something.

I mean, sure, it's kind of messed up to send a message like that to someone grinding through exam hell right now, but still.

Oh well. Maybe she's just taking her time figuring out how to word her reply. She's got a good heart. I'll wait.

“…”

“…”

“…”

“Hey… did the message go through?”

Okay, I'm getting antsy.

“Sorry. I just didn't know what to say. So… congrats?”

Not sure why that came out as a question, but yeah, looks like she really was just trying to come up with the right words. That's Temari for you—always considerate.

“Heh, thanks. Sorry, but I'm diving headfirst into adulthood while you're still stuck in cram school hell. Sucks to suck.”

“So… who's the lucky girl?”

“You remember that girl I was talking to at the library yesterday? Her. Sara Naegi.”

“…”

And there it is. Radio silence from Temari again. Maybe she's studying now or something.

“Sorry, I just wanted to brag. Didn't mean to bother you while you're trying to focus.”

“It's fine. Whatever… Maybe I should go get myself a boyfriend too.”

Oh?

Guess she's not busy after all. If anything, she's probably off in lala-land now, daydreaming about imaginary boyfriends. Totally unfit for exam life.

…

Now that I think about it, did Temari ever date anyone back in high school?

Honestly, from where I was standing, she was pretty damn cute. Not “drop-dead gorgeous” or anything, but definitely upper-tier cute, like a bubbly gyaru type from the popular crowd.

Sure, her personality's a bit much, but she's got that weird charm that keeps her from being totally annoying.

“You never had a boyfriend back in high school, did you?”

“Nope. Didn't want one.”

That was fast. Guess that checks out. If she had been seeing someone, there's no way she would’ve been spending so many after-school hours doing one-on-one study sessions with me.

“Still though, a girl like you could've had two or three boyfriends easy.”

“What the hell do you take me for?”

“I mean, even if you didn't have a boyfriend, I wouldn't be surprised if you had five or six f**k buddies.”

“I swear to God, I'm gonna beat your dumb a*s.”

“I meant it as a compliment. Like, you seem popular enough to pull it off.”

“Yeah, well, that's not a compliment.”

Hmm, guess I'll ease off on the jokes. Temari might talk like she doesn't give a s**t, but she doesn’t seem like the type who spreads her legs for just anyone. That's actually a good thing.

Girls who put out too easily usually end up in deep s**t eventually. If you’re lucky, it ends with a forced marriage and a shotgun wedding. If you’re not, the guy bails and you’re left knocked up, ignored, and carrying your regrets on your shoulders. Real tragic stuff. Wrap it before you tap it, folks.

…Wait a sec. Could it be that Temari's still got her cherry intact?

In this day and age? Damn. That's rare. Girls who can't even protect their own hymens probably can't protect anything else either.

Not that this is just about Temari. It applies to anyone, really.

Anyway, moving on.

Now that I've finished bragging to Temari, I need to get my s**t together and prep for what's next.

First order of business: buy some decent clothes for a date. Looks like it's time to dip into my stash and withdraw about fifty thousand yen. Guess it’s worth it.

―・―・―・―・―・―・―

The next morning, I got a message from Naegi.

“I need to talk to you about something important. Can we meet at our usual spot before second period?”

Ohhh hell yeah. The secret lovers’ meeting invite just dropped!! I wouldn’t even mind if it starts with a surprise kiss or two—I'm f*****g ready!!

So there I was, bobbing my head in giddy excitement, headbanging like an idiot all the way to the courtyard.

But reality? That b***h showed up hard.

With an apologetic look on her face, Naegi told me straight to my face:

“I'm really sorry. I know I said yes yesterday… but I want to take that back. Can we put things on hold for now?”

“…The f**k?”

I didn't even need a mirror to know how dumb I looked right then. I probably had the exact face of a pigeon who just got hit in the face with a bean bullet. If I had a choice, I'd rather get blasted by Naegi's own chest-bean squirt gun than deal with this s**t.

“I'm really sorry. Right after I gave you my answer, Nishida also confessed to me…”

“…Huh?”

“So I need time to think. I promise I'll give you my answer tomorrow.”

“….”

Hold the f**k up. Isn't there some unspoken rule about this? Like, even if it's by one second or one f*****g heartbeat, the first one to confess gets priority, no?

It's not like she turned me down and then Nishida showed up—she actually said yes to me. What the actual hell?

Why the f**k don't I get priority?

I wanted to scream that right in her face, but deep down I knew—it's her feelings that matter most right now. No matter how much it pisses me off.

“…Fine. I'll be waiting. For the right answer.”

What else could I even say?

It's okay. I can take this. I'm not some emotionally fragile wreck. I've always been solid, dependable. I keep my s**t together in class, take notes, stay on top of things. Sure, I used to be a bit scrawny, but thanks to Shaolin training, I toughened up. Hell, I even think I've made it up to average in the looks department.

Meanwhile, Nishida? That guy sleeps through lectures, skips classes, and lives like a complete slob. Just last week, he pissed away all his cash on a trip to the pachinko parlor. Total f*****g gambling junkie.

Only thing he has over me is height. That's it.

In every other goddamn category, I'm the better choice.

So yeah, I really thought Naegi would pick me in the end.

“I'm sorry. I've decided to go out with Nishida. You're dependable, Nakazawa-kun. I think you'll be fine on your own. But Nishida… I feel like he'll fall apart if I'm not there for him.”

Didn't even have the balls to say it face to face—she dumped me over a f*****g LINE message.

And yeah, I blocked her a*s the second I read that. Basic breakup protocol.

But come on. Like my brain or heart could just move on and accept that.

What the hell, man.

What the f**k did I even try so hard for?