Chapter 8: Not just words

Reading Settings

Translator: Soafp

---

Something had changed.

Wednesday, lunchtime. I was passing by Class 2's classroom when my eyes met Himuro Rin's.

Normally—lately—she would give a small nod in my direction.

Not exactly a greeting, but a sign in her own way that said, “I see you.”

Today, that didn't happen.

The moment our eyes met, she looked away.

I saw her back as she walked quickly into the classroom.

“…………”

Did something happen?

Did I do something wrong?

I had no idea. Last week's volunteer session—she had said, “See you next week.” The atmosphere back then had been warm.

I hadn't had the chance to meet her at school on Monday or Tuesday, and I don't remember doing anything strange.

And yet—the distance had returned.

No, not just returned—it felt like the wall between us was even thicker than before.

While eating lunch and thinking, Kaito peeked over.

“What's wrong? Your chopsticks haven't moved for a while.”

“…Just thinking.”

“About Himuro Rin?”

“………”

“Bingo.”

Kaito looked at me sideways, sipping on his coffee milk through a straw.

“Did something happen?”

“I don't know. It feels like a wall suddenly appeared. Things were fine until last week.”

“Hmm… girls can change their attitude suddenly. Maybe you stepped on a landmine or something.”

“I didn't even get the chance to step on a landmine. We haven't met in the past few days.”

“Then—maybe something happened where you weren't aware of it?”

Somewhere I didn't know.

In other words—rumors, or someone putting ideas in her head.

“…Ah.”

“Do you have any idea what it might be?”

“I mean… maybe stories from my past have gotten around.”

“The ones about being a pI@yb0y?”

“Probably.”

Kaito thought for a moment and then said,

“Well, it's true.”

“…No mercy, huh.”

“Facts are facts. How many people you've dated, how long it lasted—those things can't be changed.”

“I know.”

“The problem is how Himuro Rin takes it, right?”

That's right.

Himuro Rin judges based on what she sees. Not on rumors or impressions, but by seeing with her own eyes and thinking with her own mind.

That's why—my past would be taken head-on.

No faking it.

No excuses would work.

“…So, what do we do?”

“What do we do? Nothing changes.”

“Nothing changes?”

“I'll do the same thing. Honest, straightforward, showing it through my actions. That's all I can do.”

Kaito looked at me for a moment—and then let out a small laugh.

“You've really changed, huh.”

“I told you that before.”

“I'll say it as many times as I need to. It's the truth.”

---

Thursday.

After school, just outside the school gates, someone called out.

“Ah, Ito-kun!”

I turned around to see a familiar girl.

Mizuki Nakazato from Class 4 of the second year.

—The girl I dated for about two months last autumn before breaking up.

“Long time no see. How have you been?”

“Yeah, good. And you, Ito-kun?”

“Well, I'm okay.”

Mizuki was as cheerful as ever.

Even after breaking up, being able to talk normally like this was natural to me.

Breaking up doesn't mean I hate someone. I don't think the time we spent together was wasted.

“Hey, I wanted to ask you something… do you have time now?”

“Ask me? Sure, what is it?”

“I've got someone I like. But that person knows I dated you, so I think they're a little hesitant…”

“Ah, I see. So it's awkward because of me?”

“Sorry, it's a weird thing to say.”

“No, it's fine. Who is it? Someone I know?”

She said the name of the person.

I knew him. A serious-type boy in the same grade.

“He seems like a good guy. I think he'd be good for you, Mizuki.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. And if I'm getting in the way, I can talk to him. Tell him, ‘I've finished things properly with Mizuki, she's a great girl—take care of her.'”

“Eh—really?”

“Of course. I wouldn't want Mizuki's romance to fail because of me.”

Mizuki's eyes widened, and then she smiled, happy.

“Thanks. You really haven't changed, Ito-kun.”

“Changed how?”

“Your honesty. Both when we dated and even after we broke up.”

“…Being called honest feels a little embarrassing. Especially when people call me a pI@yb0y.”

“I don't really like calling you a pI@yb0y. I think you're just being sincere about love.”

She said that, waved, and left with a smile.

—Honest, huh.

I've never thought of myself as honest.

I've dated many people, and the relationships didn't last.

Looking at the results alone, it's no wonder people call me a pI@yb0y.

But—I was serious every time.

I've never dated someone casually.

When breaking up, I faced it head-on and never tried to hurt the other person.

Even so, the label of “pI@yb0y” doesn't go away.

Results are results.

This is probably what Himuro Rin is worried about too.

“She might think I'll do the same thing again.”

To overturn that—I can't rely on words.

It takes time, actions, and determination.

---

Friday.

Lunchtime. Passing by Class 2's classroom again.

I hesitated on whether to call out—but decided not to.

Because I could tell she was trying to keep her distance.

If I pushed too hard now, it would just feel forced.

But she hasn't completely pulled away.

After school.

Passing by the staff room, I saw the “Notice from the Library Committee” posted on the bulletin board.

It listed new books in the library.

Among them—was the new release by the author she said she liked.

A translated book that had come out last month.

I jotted down the title on my phone and planned to stop by a bookstore on the way home.

The first volume of the series she liked, and the new release.

I bought both.

I'd start with the first volume.

I had promised to go talk about my impressions, and I'd keep that promise.

While she was keeping her distance, I wouldn't force myself on her.

But a promise is a promise.

At home, I lay on my bed and started reading.

…It was interesting.

At first, I had only intended to create a topic to talk to her about.

But by the third chapter, I was completely absorbed.

The way the story planted foreshadowing was delicate, and the psychological depiction of the characters was merciless.

The perspectives of the characters, which had been omitted in the movie, gave the story a completely different depth.

I could understand why she wanted to talk about it.

I now understood how she had gotten so engrossed when she talked to me back then.

Before I knew it, it was 1 a.m. I had finished the first volume.

I wanted to read the second volume immediately, but I hadn't bought it.

I'd go to the bookstore again tomorrow.

Checking my phone, I saw a message from Kaito.

‘Tomorrow's volunteer, right? Don't overdo it.'

‘I'm not overdoing it. Just normal.'

‘I've said it so many times—your normal isn't normal—well, whatever. Good luck.'

I put my phone down and stared at the ceiling.

Tomorrow, I'd see Himuro Rin.

She'd probably still have that wall up.

She's trying to keep her distance because of my past.

I couldn't overturn that with words.

Saying “I'm serious” a hundred times wouldn't matter.

Who would believe a pI@yb0y saying he's serious?

That's why—I'd show it through actions.

Keeping my promises.

Not lying.

Not backing down, but not forcing myself.

It might take time.

But I can wait.

For her, I can wait as long as it takes.

---

Saturday. Fourth volunteer session.

When I arrived in front of the community center, Himuro Rin was already there.

She was talking with a staff member, her expression serious—probably checking the schedule for today's flowerbed replanting.

I didn't go near her, putting on my gloves a little farther away.

Other participants gathered. Mimura Sota was there too.

He looked at me even more sharply than before. I hadn't done anything.

The instructions started.

Today's main task was replanting the park flowerbeds. Remove the old soil, add new soil and seedlings. It was physical work.

When dividing into groups—I didn't aim for anything.

As a result of the natural grouping, Himuro Rin and I ended up in the same team. Pure coincidence. Really.

…No, I was a little happy. Honestly.

The work began.

I crouched in front of the flowerbed and dug up the old soil with a spade.

Himuro Rin was beside me, silently digging the soil as well.

No conversation.

Until last week, I would have spoken first.

But today, I moved my hands quietly.

Thirty minutes. An hour.

Sweat ran down my forehead. Even under June's cloudy sky, digging soil made it hot.

Yet, strangely, it didn't feel unpleasant.

Just working side by side with her—was enough.

We finished removing all the old soil and were at the stage of putting in new potting soil.

Carrying the heavy soil bags, other members would take a bag and rest.

I kept carrying them silently. Three bags, four bags.

Himuro Rin carried them too. She was small, so fewer than me, but she didn't rest.

“…It's heavy. I'll carry it, you level the soil.”

I naturally suggested it as a way to work together.

She looked at me for a moment—and nodded.

“…Got it.”

That was all.

But she didn't refuse.

We moved on to planting the seedlings.

Marigolds, salvias, petunias. I planted the seedlings the staff aunt had prepared, spacing them evenly.

I'd never done any gardening before. But I dug holes by watching and copying, put in the seedlings, and covered them with soil.

“Deeper there.”

Himuro Rin's voice.

“Like this?”

“A little more. So the roots are covered.”

“Got it.”

I planted according to her instructions.

Her tone was businesslike. There was none of the softness from last week.

But—she was talking to me.

She hadn't completely closed the wall.

That alone gave me enough hope.

---

Break time.

Today, I didn't sit next to Himuro Rin.

I sat on a bench a little away, drinking water.

Then—she came.

Strictly speaking, she didn't come to me.

She just walked past my bench on her way to the vending machine to get a drink.

But she stopped for a moment as she passed.

“…Fujimiya.”

“Hm?”

“Did you read that book?”

My heart skipped.

That book.

The novel she said she liked.

“I did. The first volume. Read it all at once.”

“…I see.”

“It was good. I understand why you wanted to talk about it. The end of chapter three completely got me.”

Her eyes shifted slightly.

The caution hadn't disappeared. But beneath it, another light flickered.

“The end of chapter three… I get it. That's the entrance to this story.”

“Entrance. Yeah, that's right. That one sentence turns the world upside down. I'm on the second volume now, though—”

“You bought the second volume too?”

“Of course. I can't stop halfway.”

“….”

Silence.

She was twirling the bottle of tea she had bought at the vending machine in her hands.

Her face—hesitating over something.

“…Your thoughts?”

“Huh?”

“When you finish reading it—tell me what you think.”

Her voice was small.

She didn't look at me, keeping her eyes on the bottle.

“…Of course. I promise.”

“Promise sounds so serious.”

“It's not serious. To me, it is.”

She took a small breath.

She seemed about to say something—but ended up walking toward the vending machine without saying anything.

But.

The wall—had thinned a little.

It hadn't disappeared. She was still cautious. Afraid, knowing about my past.

But—“Tell me your thoughts” was a hand extended from behind that wall.

I didn't need to grab it forcefully. I just needed to accept it and return it as promised.

That was enough.

---

Afternoon work ended.

The flowerbed looked completely transformed. Colorful seedlings swayed in the breeze atop the fresh soil.

Hearing the staff aunt happily say, “It looks so beautiful now,” made me feel a little proud too.

At dismissal.

Himuro Rin stood in front of the flowerbed, gazing at it for a while.

Her profile, looking at the freshly planted seedlings—peaceful.

Until now, she had watered this flowerbed alone. Now it was filled with new flowers.

I and the other members had participated in today's work—but without a doubt, she had cared for this flowerbed the most.

I wanted to say something.

“It's beautiful.”

But—today, I didn't.

Instead, on my way out, I spoke to the staff aunt.

“Could I also be put on the schedule for watering the flowerbed from next time?”

“Oh, really? I'm glad. Until now, Rin has been doing it all by herself.”

“Yes. Please let me do it too.”

The aunt nodded happily and added my name to the schedule with her pen.

Not words—but action.

Not toward Rin Himuro herself, but toward what she holds dear.

It might be indirect.

But—this is my way.

On the way home.

I stopped by a bookstore and bought the second volume.

And the third, too. I probably can't stop myself.

After paying at the register and stepping outside, my phone buzzed.

Not Kaito—no.

A LINE notification. Seeing the sender's name, I froze.

Himuro Rin.

Somehow, she had added me as a friend—or rather, we were connected through the volunteer group. This was the first personal message.

My fingers trembled as I opened it.

‘Tell me your thoughts after finishing volume three. I'm afraid of spoilers if you tell me before.'

…That was it.

A single, matter-of-fact sentence.

But I—stood in front of the convenience store, staring at the screen for about five minutes.

Himuro Rin had sent me a personal LINE.

This wasn't the wall thinning.

A small window had opened in that wall.

I typed a reply. Deleted it. Rewrote it. Deleted it. Typed again.

In the end, I sent—

‘Got it. I'll read through volume three at once. Look forward to it.'

Read receipt appeared.

No reply came.

But—that was fine.

The window had opened.

I wanted to treasure the view I could see through it.