Chapter 4: Someone Who Shouldn’t Suit Me

Reading Settings

Translator: Soafp

---

Monday morning. When I entered the classroom, Yui was already waiting.

The moment I placed my bag in my usual seat, she leaned over from the side.

“How was Saturday?”

“…Good morning, Yui.”

“Good morning. So, how was it?”

She didn't even bother with a greeting.

“How do you mean, how was it?”

“The volunteer thing. Fujimiya-kun went, right?”

…How did she find out? What kind of information network does this school have?

“He came. That's it.”

“That's it? That can't be it. You even called out to him last week, didn't you? Two weeks in a row?”

“I just went to volunteer. He said three sessions for the penalty, so I just went because it was required.”

“Oh, really? So you didn't talk with Rin at all?”

“….”

“Ah, that looks like you did.”

“I didn't.”

“Then why did you look away?”

—I can't lie to this girl. Always have been. Yui usually floats around casually, but at times like this, she's oddly sharp.

“…I talked a little. Just a bit during the work.”

“Just a bit?”

“Just a bit.”

“Just a bit.”

“Specifically?”

I sighed. Any attempt to dodge now would just make her persist.

“He helped me take out some trash from the gutter. And we talked a little about a bee.”

“A bee?”

“There was a bee trapped inside a bulletin board. Fujimiya let it out, and we realized it was a bumblebee.”

“Huh…”

Yui crossed her arms, scrutinizing me.

“That sounds pretty fun, doesn't it?”

“It wasn't fun.”

“Then it was boring?”

“….”

It wasn't boring either. To be honest.

When we watched the bumblebee fly out of the bulletin board together, Fujimiya laughed and said, “That's kind of funny.”

At that moment—just for a second—something inside me loosened.

I still don't know what that was. I don't even want to.

“…It was normal, I guess.”

“Rin's ‘normal' is like the world's ‘pretty good,' you know.”

“Don't translate my feelings for me.”

Yui chuckled. I let it be.

---

Break time after the second period.

I was drinking water in the hallway when a voice called from behind.

“Rin.”

It was Sota.

“What is it?”

“Nothing… I just thought you might be busy recently. You haven't replied to my LINE at all.”

…Ah, right. Sota had sent me a LINE yesterday, but I hadn't replied.

It was a message like, “It's hot today,” not much to respond to.

“I'm not particularly busy. I just didn't have anything to reply with.”

“Eh… well, even if there's nothing to say, you could've just replied—”

“If you need something, just say it. Class is about to start.”

I might have sounded cold.

But this is my normal. Sota should know that.

“Oh, okay. Then… you're going to volunteer again this Saturday, right? Want to walk home together?”

“Sure, whatever.”

“Really? Okay, it's decided then.”

Sota smiled happily.

…Huh.

Before, seeing that smile would make my chest feel a little warm.

Now—just normal.

It's not that I feel nothing.

Sota is my childhood friend. We've known each other a long time. He knows me well. There's comfort in that.

But recently—there's something that slightly bothers me.

Last week, on the way back from volunteering.

Sota said, “Watch out for guys like Fujimiya who are used to women.”

As a warning, that's normal.

For a childhood friend, it's natural to worry.

But his tone at that time—there was something mixed in that wasn't exactly worry.

How should I put it?

It didn't feel like he was worried about me, more like he was trying to push Fujimiya away.

…Am I overthinking?

Sota is Sota. We've known each other for over ten years.

It's weird for me to be bothered by something like this.

---

Lunch break.

I bought bread from the school store and returned to the classroom. Yui was sitting there, having her bento ready.

“Welcome back. Hey Rin, can I ask you something?”

“What?”

“What do you think about Fujimiya-kun?”

I froze with bread in my mouth.

“…Why all of a sudden?”

“Well, he went to volunteer two weeks in a row, and he even called out to you at school. That clearly means he's conscious of you, right?”

“I don't know. That's his choice.”

“Yeah, I get that. But I'm wondering what you think.”

I swallowed my bread before answering.

“A pl@yb0y. Used to women. Kind to everyone, shows the same face to everyone. —People like that I don't trust.”

“Yeah, I heard that before. So you hate him?”

“I didn't say I hate him.”

“Then do you like him?”

“I didn't say that either.”

“Then what?”

“….”

It's hard to answer “what.”

I don't dislike him. But I don't like him either.

I'm wary, but—not uncomfortable.

He is indeed experienced with women.

His way of speaking, his closeness—it's that of a practiced person.

But—around me, he's different.

He stumbles over words, his eyes dart, polite speech mixes in. He even messes up lines he probably prepared.

Would a seasoned pl@yb0y be that clumsy?

And then, what he said on Saturday. I still remember it.

“At first, it was selfish motives. But it changed along the way.”

I don't know anyone else who'd honestly say that.

Normally, people hide it. Try to look cool. Lie, saying, “I meant to take it seriously from the start.”

Fujimiya didn't lie.

He offered up his awkward side, just as it was.

At that moment—I was a little troubled.

I didn't know how to react.

So I said, “Weird person.”

Because nothing else came to mind.

“…I don't know.”

“Eh?”

“I said I don't know. About my feelings. So I can't answer right now.”

Yui blinked in surprise. Then—slowly—she grinned.

“It's the first time I've heard you say ‘I don't know.'”

“….”

“You're always so decisive, Rin. Like, yes or no, necessary or not, black or white. I thought you never wavered.”

“…I do sometimes.”

“Yeah. And you know—”

Yui happily picked up a piece of tamagoyaki with her chopsticks.

“I think that's actually pretty important.”

…Important for what?

I didn't have the energy to ask.

---

After school.

As I exited the school gate, Sota fell in beside me.

“Good job today. Long day, huh.”

“…Yeah.”

“Hey Rin, want to stop by a convenience store on the way home? They have a new ice cream.”

“Sure, whatever.”

We walked side by side.

The same route home we've walked hundreds of times since elementary school.

Sota talked about recent stuff—upcoming tests, annoying upperclassmen in club.

I gave simple responses, just listening.

The usual scenery.

“Oh, right. About Fujimiya.”

My body tensed slightly.

“Did he try talking to you today too?”

“…No. I didn't see him today.”

“Got it. Well, he'll probably get bored soon anyway. That's how he always is.”

“….”

“By the way, Sakamoto said he was hanging out with another girl last month too. Really shameless, huh?”

Sota said it with a laugh.

I—didn't say anything.

But a small thorn pricked my heart.

This isn't the first time Sota has said things like this.

Before—he'd joke about someone's faults.

Boys in class. Teachers. People nearby.

He would always preface it with, “Well, just between us.”

I used to think—oh, that's just boys joking around. No deeper meaning.

But.

Recently, it bothers me.

Before, it didn't.

What changed?

“—Rin? Are you listening?”

“I am.”

“You've been a bit spacey lately, haven't you?”

“I'm not.”

“Okay, good. Oh, the convenience store is this way—”

Sota walked ahead.

I followed, trying to pinpoint the source of my unease.

Has Sota always been like this?

Was he always someone who laughs while talking about others' faults?

I don't know. Maybe I just hadn't noticed. Maybe he changed.

Or—maybe I'm the one who changed.

While Sota picked out ice cream, I glanced at the magazine section near the entrance.

There—was a familiar figure.

Fujimiya Ito.

In casual clothes, buying something at the register.

Next to him, a boy who seemed to be a friend—probably Ozaki from the same class.

The two laughed at something together.

Then.

The clerk dropped a product. A bottle rolled across the floor.

Fujimiya instinctively crouched to pick it up and handed it to the clerk.

The clerk bowed, “Sorry,” and he replied with a smile, “No problem at all.”

Just that.

Something anyone could do—but not everyone does it naturally.

And I—know that.

Fujimiya didn't notice me.

He left the store laughing with his friend.

Watching him leave—I thought the same words again.

Weird person.

But now, it didn't feel like the same meaning as the first time.

Sota asked, “Rin, vanilla or chocolate?”

“…Either's fine.”

“Come on, choose.”

“Then vanilla.”

I took the ice cream, and we stepped outside.

Fujimiya Ito was already out of sight.

The June evening breeze was slightly cool.

—He just doesn't suit me, I thought.

That person and I—we don't suit each other.

Our tastes, personalities, ways of interacting with people—everything's different.

But.

“Not suiting each other doesn't matter”—I can't say that so confidently anymore.

And that scares me a little.