Chapter 34: This is also her heart!

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Translator: Soafp

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Emu Honma was an M.

She understood that fact better than anyone, but it was something she intended to keep to herself. She had no desire to tell anyone else.

“…Am I strange?”

She had often asked her reflection that question.

She did not know why she had developed this preference. Even so, the idea of being dominated by someone excited Emu more than anything.

“Go out with me!”

“No. Know your place.”

Boys who confessed to her continued to appear one after another, unaware of her true nature. Each time, Emu rejected them with harsh words.

A part of her had once possessed a destructive, hopeless fantasy: that one of them might become enraged and attack her because of those words.

But by now, she knew that way of thinking had been wrong.

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“Emu! Let's have lunch.”

“Alright.”

It was an ordinary lunch break.

After finishing her meal with her close friends, Emu suddenly felt her head become hazy and stood up.

At first, this strange sensation had confused her. But that was no longer the case.

If she followed it, she would be able to meet her Master.

“Hey, Emu. You've been going somewhere a lot lately. What are you doing?”

“I have something to take care of. I'll be back.”

With that, Emu left the classroom.

As she drew closer to her destination, she realized that she was becoming incredibly excited. At the same time, the face of one particular boy appeared in her mind.

“Emu, you're my partner today.”

It was Kai, her senior—someone who had become important to her in many different ways.

She owed him for resolving her stalking problem, whatever method he had used.

But honestly, that memory no longer mattered very much to her.

“Senpai… Senpai…”

Muttering Kai's name under her breath, Emu headed toward an empty classroom.

When she opened the door, Kai was already waiting inside.

“Oh, you came, Emu.”

The moment she saw him sitting in the chair, Emu hurried over.

She wanted to apologize for keeping him waiting. She wanted to tell him that she would begin serving him immediately.

With those feelings in mind, she knelt before him.

“Hey, don't be so eager. But that side of you is cute too. Alright, then. Go ahead.”

Being looked down upon by Kai let Emu lose herself in the feeling of being under his control.

There were no toys or other equipment available at school, so she could not experience the more extreme forms of restraint she secretly wanted.

Even so, her heart felt completely satisfied.

(This sensation… I'm choosing to do this because I want to make Senpai happy, but I still don't know whether it's real or a dream.)

No matter how many times she experienced it, Emu still could not determine what this sensation was.

But she no longer cared.

Kai was right in front of her, and he was happy.

That was enough.

(Senpai… I'm such a pervert. I can't feel satisfied unless you torment me. I want you to train me more and more.)

The desires hidden within her heart began overflowing one after another.

This moment felt both like reality and a dream. Because of that, her body longed for an even stronger connection.

Afterward, Kai looked thoroughly refreshed and rested his face against Emu's chest.

“Emu, this is incredible!”

“Senpai, you look like a baby.”

“This softness makes me act like this. What a blissful time.”

Compared with Mari and Saika—both Kai's classmates and important female seniors in Emu's eyes—Emu was smaller.

Even so, she was happy whenever Kai became so absorbed in her.

Being tormented by Kai was a blissful experience, but having him rely on her like this had also become precious to Emu.

“This feeling really is wonderful.”

“What was that?”

“Nothing. Here, Senpai. Let me hug you more.”

“Oh!”

What she had meant was that she could feel herself connecting directly with Kai's heart.

(When I first experienced this sensation, I wondered what it was. But I'm an M, so I was excited too. Still, the reason I didn't reject him was probably because I could feel how full of kindness Senpai's heart was.)

She remembered the very first time it had happened.

In that dreamlike sensation, it was natural for her to be startled when a boy touched her.

Yet, for some reason, she had not rejected Kai.

She had instinctively known that she could trust him.

(It doesn't matter if people think I'm strange. I don't care what they think. Meeting Senpai was what allowed me to become capable of doing things like this.)

People met in all sorts of ways, but Emu's encounter with Kai had been truly unusual.

Even so, she had caught a clear glimpse of the heart hidden beneath his outward appearance.

That was why she trusted and admired him.

“Senpai…”

“What is it?”

“Why are you so kind? Why do you worry about us so much?”

When Emu asked that, Kai stared at her blankly.

They looked at each other for a while. Then, perhaps because he found thinking about it troublesome, Kai buried his face against Emu's chest again.

Emu puffed out her cheeks in frustration.

Apparently noticing her displeased voice, Kai raised his head again.

“I keep telling you that I'm not kind. I hypnotized all of you and do things with you that I could never do in public. I know I'm a worthless, hopeless person. And now that there are two more of you, I've been getting carried away even more.”

“Two more?”

“…Well, whatever.”

Kai told her about Sasaki and Someya—two women Emu did not know—and explained that they had both suffered deep emotional wounds.

Emu felt a slight pang in her chest at hearing that he had become involved with other women without her knowledge.

But she still smiled.

He really is kind, she thought.

“That doesn't make me kind. I only thought about whether there was anything I could do. Without this power, I'm so helpless that I couldn't have solved anything in the first place.”

“I don't think that's true.”

“It is true. Anyway, this conversation is over!”

In the end, Emu let Kai do as he pleased before they parted.

Her clear awareness returned only after she was back in the classroom.

She could not remember exactly what she had been doing or how she had returned. The memories remained embedded in her mind like fragments of a dream.

“…Senpai.♪”

After sitting at her desk, Emu began imagining Kai as usual.

She did not know which parts were real and which were false.

But she knew that the words he had spoken in those memories contained no lies.

“Emu? What on earth is wrong with you?”

Apparently, her expression had been so unusual that it threatened to shatter the image people had of her.

Emu composed herself and put on her usual sharp, dignified expression.

But she still found herself imagining Kai. The corners of her mouth rose, and her carefully maintained expression gradually collapsed.

“…This is bad. Just how much of a pervert am I?”

Emu covered her face with her hands and writhed in embarrassment.

Mari and Saika had experienced the same kind of unclear, shared memories.

Like Emu, they sensed that something unusual was happening, yet they placed their complete trust in Kai.

They were alike in that way, which was why they had become friends.

“When I'm in that hazy state, I can't control myself. I start thinking that I want Senpai to do more to me—that I want him to use me more and more.”

If she forced herself to accept that it was only a dream, she felt she might offer him everything she had.

Even something precious that she had protected for so long.

Emu spent the rest of the day thinking about it and trembling with excitement until the final bell.

“See you, Emu.”

“Yeah. See you tomorrow.”

After school, Emu said goodbye to her friends and began walking home alone.

A woman was walking toward her from the opposite direction.

“…?”

There was nothing particularly distinctive about the woman. Emu merely thought that she was attractive.

For some reason, however, Emu could not look away. She continued staring until the woman noticed.

“Do you need something?”

“No, nothing. I'm sorry.”

“Is that so?”

Since Emu was only a young girl, the woman did not seem particularly uncomfortable and continued walking.

As Emu watched her leave, she realized that she had felt something unpleasant toward the woman.

“…Why? Why do I feel this way about someone I've only just met?”

It was not simple disgust. It was a complicated emotion she could not explain.

Once the woman disappeared from view, Emu gradually calmed down.

Even so, she found herself hoping that she would never encounter that woman again—not even by chance.