Chapter 6: My Little Brother’s Dream Part 1

Translator: Soafp

October 10, 2012. Wednesday. 4:07 PM. I was five. Kai-chan was four.

The warm atmosphere in the house had become completely cold and chilly. The soft voices of the family gathered around the dining table were now filled with yelling and the crying of children.

There used to be two children in this house. The little boy crying now is no longer here. My younger brother, Kai-chan… And the little girl crying just as loudly is me. Yes, this day… this day was… the last day for my father and mother.

“I'm taking only Kai-chan with me!”

My mother was shouting, her hostility laid bare. She was pulling my dear little brother, who was only mine, with all her strength, trying to drag him away. Poor Kai-chan. He was crying so hard that it looked like he was going to have a fit.

“Do whatever you want!”

My father spat coldly. I couldn't believe it. I thought my father would stop her. Do I really have to be separated from my beloved Kai-chan? …No, I don't want that! I'm supposed to protect Kai-chan. That's what they told me. I'm the older sister, so I have to protect him.

“Dad, stop Mom. I don't want to say goodbye to Kai-chan. I have to protect Kai-chan.”

I cried. Tears and snot ran down my face as I desperately pleaded. But my mother dragged the screaming Kai-chan out of the apartment. Crying, I chased after them. Incredibly, my father didn't follow. Soon, a taxi my mother had called arrived.

“Mom. Give him back, give Kai-chan back to me!”

“Onee-chan! Onee-chan!”

Our cries echoed throughout the neighborhood until the taxi door, carrying Mom and Kai-chan, closed.

…

After my mother took my brother away from me, I started longing for Kai-chan even more, always thinking about him in my heart. I was so worried about my brother, who had been taken away, that I couldn't sleep at night. My bed-wetting, which had been cured, came back. My thumb-sucking, which had also stopped, returned.

I hated my father, who had driven Kai-chan out of the house, and I hated the woman he remarried. …In a house without Kai-chan, there wasn't even a tiny bit of space for me. There was a deep, indescribable hole in my chest, making me feel unbearably cold.

“The next stop is Keio Tama Center, the terminal station.”

The announcement for the Keio Line's Tama Center stop woke me up, and I hurried off the train to wait on the opposite platform for the one going to Hashimoto.

Though it was June, an oddly cold breeze softly brushed through my hair. It felt like my heart was being peered into, and my heart chilled to the core.