Chapter 11: Convalescence.
Translated and Edited by: ynlucca.
Common Honorifics:
-san: A polite suffix, but not excessively formal.
-kun: A common suffix among friends and younger people.
-chan: A common suffix among people you’re close with, mostly used for feminine nicknames and girls, since it’s cutesy and childlike.
-senpai: A common suffix and noun used to address or refer to one’s older or more senior colleagues in a school, workplace, dojo, or sports club.
We returned to the shrine, and as I stepped into its grounds, I felt inexplicably warm once more. It was far too pleasant for a cold spring night, so I sat down in front of its altar and took in the comfortable atmosphere.
Time for a late dinner. I haven’t eaten anything since I woke up, so my stomach was basically an empty void. Yeah, I’m starving.
As I was unpacking my smashed sandwich, cat called out to me.
“Mister, I’m going to gaze into you now, so don’t move~! You can eat your dinner while I do it though.”
“Come to think of it,” I stopped for a moment. “Does she need to gaze to use her powers? Will my curse be lifted then?”
“Her gaze will be used to find out the extent of what she needs to do. The real work will come after that,” the raven-haired goddess sat down next to me, resting her chin on her hand.
It was a casual gesture, but sexy nonetheless.
Oh, what a waste… She would be a peerless beauty if only her words and actions wouldn’t often cross many lines. As I thought so, she looked at me and said, “What’s up with that lukewarm loon on your face?”
“What do I have to do to break the curse?” I changed the subject.
“…Thanks for being proactive, but there’s no need for you to do anything in particular. Just leave it all to Tama-san.”
She still had a suspicious glint in her eye but didn’t pry further. I got away from exposing my rude remarks, it seems.
“Hey, mister,” Tama heard us. “Cheer for me! I’ll have thrice the amount of power! C’mon, give me some careless whispers like, ‘Hang in there, Tama-chan’ or some passionate shouts like ‘I love you!’”
“How shameless! Cheering is not allowed!” The black-haired goddess busted up at cat’s request, who, in retaliation, shot back her own two cents.
“Why not? He’ll triple my motivation, which will strengthen my faith and end up breaking his curse! It’s a win-win situation!”
“I didn’t get any support when I was using the Oracle! This isn’t fair!”
“I don’t know anything about that! You should’ve bargained more, Shu-chan. Don’t get in my way, I’m trying to haggle for a fair price.”
“Then I did my best too! I deserve a fair payment!” She then stood up to look at me. “Dear! I, too, have done my best with the Oracle! Thus, I’m deserving of a reward!”
Didn’t you just call me shameless a second ago? That’s a 180 if I’ve ever seen one, I thought to myself. Well, despite that, if there’s anything I can give back to the two, I’d be glad to do so.
“Hmm, come to think of it, didn’t you want me to wall-slam you?”
“…A, are you for real? I won’t forgive any take-backs, ‘kay?”
Mrs. black-haired goddess… When you get upset, your tone gets incredibly sussy, almost as if you’ve been faking a noble lady tone all this time—I kept this thought to myself.
“Huh?! That’s not fair! I want a lap pillow now!”
“That’s a no-no, Tama-san. There is no reward for people who haven’t produced results.”
“Huh?! Why are you calling the shots, Shu-chan?! —It doesn’t matter! I don’t care even if you get it first!”
“Work, show results, and then talk to me.”
Cat furrowed her brows in a trouble. She couldn’t argue back because of her fair price argument from earlier.
“S, s**t! I’m just going to finish this as fast as I can, so just wait for me!”
Looking at cat’s desperate response, raven sighed. “Why should I wait though?”
“Because you’ll make me jealous and distract me! Don’t make me say it!”
She complained her true intentions outwardly, rolled up her arms with impatience, and reached out her hand. Her white, silky fingers rested atop of my head as I sat there.
There’s not much… Actually, there’s no hair here. What were they even on about?
“Mister… You thought of something rude, didn’t you? I could see it in your eyes.”
Sharp as ever. After scolding me a bit, she began to mutter a chant. As if responding to her mantras, her pallid hands glowed a pale green… So this is her gaze.
As I watched a miracle unfold while eating my cold hot dog and the bumped salad, the black-haired goddess began explaining cat’s powers.
“Her miracle is called Convalescence, which means she can heal wounds and illnesses.”
“Oh~ No need for a hospital, then? Does it work on jinxes too?”
“It can restore a person to their healthy state and remove all external factors, including curses and the like. If she has enough faith, she can even revive others.”
“Isn’t this ability too powerful? I mean, yes, it is a miracle, given that she can even resuscitate people… If she can do something like that, why don’t you two have any followers left?“
“We basically never use miracles… No, we used it once or twice on humans before.”
“Why don’t you use it more? I haven’t seen a single worshipper come to this shrine since I met you, but I think that if you put this power forward, you could’ve had a lot more followers.”
“If our miracles are used recklessly, it could cause the destruction of mankind’s rationale. For example, if Tama-san were to heal everyone, no matter who they were, there would be no need for doctors and medicine would not progress, resulting in that area of science halting. It could also result in people being too complacent with having a heal-all, causing them to ask her to help with every little thing.”
“You’ve really thought it through… I thought you’d just answer something along the lines of it being too much of a hassle. Didn’t expect that at all.”
“I’ve said a lot and while it is the truth, it’s still but 90% of the reason. The rest is just because it would be too troublesome, yeah.”
Stop being honest… My respect for you went up a little back there. You’re really good at raising then lowering your reputation, huh? In any case, I thought about her argument for them not using their miracles, but I noticed a contradiction.
“Sure, but is it okay to use your miracles on me so haphazardly? Is it because I’m a rare man?”
“—No, it’s not.”
“—No.”
They both snapped back at me. Cat then stopped gazing and looked at me, and the raven-haired goddess straightened her back. Both locked their eyes with mine. The serious tone of their voices made me wonder if I had offended them again, but they seemed to be fine. Instead of the expected anger, they looked at me with warmth.
“Mister, I’m going to make this clear. Even if you were a woman all this time, I would still use convalescence on you. I’m not treating you differently just because you’re a man, I’m giving you this preference because you’re you,” cat was the first to say.
“Dear, I wanted to lend you a hand because it’s you. Besides, even if there aren’t a whole lot of men in the world, that doesn’t mean there are none. I wouldn’t just use my powers willy-nilly for any other person without a second thought. It’s not that easy,” raven followed suit.
“…You regard me so highly even though I’m just a regular old guy. There’s nothing outstanding about me, so why give me special treatment? You’ll gain nothing from this.”
The black-haired goddess chuckled at my words.
“You continue to have low self-esteem, huh…? I was really surprised about you not wanting to break the curse earlier, and I was even annoyed you didn’t ask for help. However, what impresses me the most is that you still can’t put yourself before others…”
“I think your love for your family is wonderful, despite everything. In fact, you’re so positive even after going through so much, it’s hard to believe you were even under a curse in the first place. It’s the first time I’ve ever been so interested in a human being, even more so one like you.”
“Now I’m getting compliments… Did I say something deserving of one? Isn’t it normal to care for your family despite it all? I did nothing of worth.“
Cat-face smiled and answered the confused guy in front of her.
“You know what? I’m not asking you to understand everything right now, but I want you to know this. You’re a human being deserving of happiness. You should be. That’s why I decided to give what is owed to you.”
“We were angry earlier because you didn’t wish to be happy, even though we so want you to be. However, if you still don’t wish for it, there is nothing we can do.”
“So, from now on, I will haunt you. Not for my own ego, but for your sake. I will definitely make you happy.”
“If I don’t watch you carefully, you’ll end up tripping and falling into misery. I’ll be sure to take care of you.”
Even after everything they said, I still couldn’t understand why they treated me like I was special. However, I understood that they weren’t helping me just because I was a rare man in this world, but rather because they care for me.
It’s impossible not to be happy upon hearing such a thing.
Their words were enough to shake me to my very core, and my own soul quivered. Over the past few hours, my heart has been feeling this warmth it had never before, and I could feel something rise from my heart to my throat, then to my mouth. I smiled, tears trickling down my face and kissing the ground.
I don’t remember ever being this emotional.
Seeing me so overcome with emotion, the two began babbling with joy.
“So? What did you think about my lines? Austere, right? Oh, you’re in love with me now, right? Right?!”
“Perfect, it’s settled! He’s probably head over heels now. My charm worked wonders!”
“I can hear you, you know…? Let me have this moment. And stop it! I don’t know what kind of face to make now!”
“S, speaking of which, Tama-san. What were the results?”
“Don’t change subjects!”
“Results?! Results, huh…” She gave a very ‘her’ answer. Really appropriate. “I’m not sure I have enough faith at the moment to break it,” she said, huddling her chest closer to me as if flirting.
“Huh? What are you joking about? Be serious. This is serious.”
“No, no, no, Shu-chan. This curse is extremely bad! I probably can’t do it unless we do the full chanting, and I can only do partial chanting with what I have!” She made cute gestures with her small frame to illustrate how bad the curse was.
“Didn’t you tell me a while ago to use my ‘sheer force of will’, huh?”
“This is impossible! if I had to crank a ten into a fifteen, I could muster something, but I can’t just turn ten into a thousand!” She gestured with her small body how difficult it was to cope with just her will.
“You were so excited you bit me, and now it’s suddenly impossible? Please, show me how it’s done.”
“Sorry, but this is actually impossible! It’s too much! Forgive me for being naive!” Now making full use of her petite body, she tried to gesture to raven how unreasonable it was to brute force it.
“Hey, how do you feel, huh? How does it feel to be dared so much and not be able to do it? I wish to know it for my future study, so please, enlighten me.”
“…Hic… Sorry, I’m sorry… Hic,” her gestures stopped and she started crying
Oh dear, you put the cart before the horses and now look at you. Also, can’t you forgive her, black-hair? I thought to myself, then asked cat how much faith she had.
“Hic… 100 times of what I have now still won’t be enough…”
I don’t know what the standard is for her ‘hundred times,’ but I still got that it would take a bit. I mean, it’s a hundredfold of what she has…
“How long would it take to accumulate that much faith?”
“Hmm, it’s about a wall-slam’s worth,” the black-haired goddess answered.
“I, it’s about one lap pillow for me!” Cat too.
It turned out to be a lot easier than I expected…
“I’ll do it as many times as you want if that’s all it takes, okay? If that’s all you need, it’s fine. Don’t cry.”
Cat was crestfallen at my words. “But, um… I’m currently in rehab, so if you do that, my faith will overflow.”
“What do you mean?”
“For example, if I were to get a lap pillow from you, I could get the ten-thousand faith! However, my capacity is only 100, so the extra 9900 will be all wasted.”
“The amount isn’t the problem, but rather that our receptacles are too small to handle all of it.”
“She’s speaking for herself, though. You know what I mean,” cat started bickering.
“…’Sheer force of will’.”
“…Shorry…”
I continued regardless. “Can’t you just keep replenishing as you use it? I know it’s just a layman’s idea, but it seems to me that you can use miracles regardless of the total amount, so if you start the process and you keep regenerating as you perform, it may work.”
“Hmm… That would probably work. However, it’s very hard to keep taking in faith nonstop.”
“To me, it seems quite easy. Isn’t a lap pillow enough anyway? Just keep at it until it’s done.”
“Mister, the amount of faith you possess is too extraordinary. I don’t usually have that much on me.”
What’s that? It sounds like you’re calling me something that’s not human. Rude much?
“Anyway, we just need to think of ways to gather faith, right? I just don’t have any other ideas. What about you?”
“Hmm~ If you hold my hand, I can continually absorb it, but during convalescence, I’ll be further apart. Gathering faith from afar isn’t practical.”
“Can’t I cheer you on then?”
“Maybe words aren’t enough to gather a hundred times of my current faith…” She turned to me apologetically.
“I see… Then it can’t be helped if the curse isn’t broken, is it? Let’s just have you go through rehab for the time being.”
Cat-face only got sadder at my words, to which I consoled her while thanking her for all the consideration she put in for me.
“Hic… I wanted to break the curse today, but, but I couldn’t… Hic… Don’tsh fhank me…”
She was so frustrated, she wept and stomped her feet on the ground. What a crybaby.
“There is one solution.”
As we were about to give up, raven-hair looked at us with a bitter look on her face, as if she didn’t want to say what she was about to. Hesitating several times, she tried and tried to bring it up.
“No… but… urgh…”
Despite it, she continued.
“…Dear, could you please offer your underwear to Tama-san?”
What a thing to say, this mean-eyed woman. However, contrary to how I stopped thinking at her sudden request, cat-face suddenly realized what her intentions were and shot up.
“I, I see…! If I have his underwear, faith will be supplied even when we’re far apart! Actually, if you offer me your man panties, I’ll have zero issues with the supply! I’ll have a surplus, even! —Shu-chan, you are the greatest genius to ever genius!”
“Argh, this is still annoying! It pisses me off that this is so, so annoying!”
“You say that but this is necessary! It’s an important ritual to rid mister of his curse! I have no ill intentions whatsoever!”
“Don’t lie to me! You have nothing but ill intentions!”
They started arguing. Here we go again.
“I don’t really get it, but I don’t mind it if my underwear will solve the problem, okay? If you don’t mind it being that, at least.”
The two stopped moving at my words.
“A… are you sure you’re telling the truth?”
“Yeah. I can get four pairs of trunks for only 4,000 yen (a bit under 40 USD). I’ll give you used ones if you don’t mind.”
“I won’t forgive take-backs, okay?”
“It’s not that valuable in the first place. I’ve washed it, so just please don’t tell me it’s smelly or dirty. I’ll get real depressed.”
Perhaps my words were unexpected, but the two looked downcast with their hair over their eyes.
“T, Tama-san… I feel so guilty right now…”
“What a coincidence… me too…”
“I, it’s like we’re tricking a pre-pubescent boy…”
“What’s going on with his sense of chastity…?”
I then took my underwear out of my Boston bag and held it in front of the depressed duo. “Do you want them? Do you not? Which is it?”
“I DO~♡♡♡” the two said at the same time, jumping onto my offering with a cheerfully disheveled looks on their faces.
T/N: We’re almost there guys! Retribution is upon us!
To the ones questioning if the abusers will receive or not what they deserve, don’t worry. They will.
Thank you for reading! Feel free to comment your opinions below!
Also, if you enjoyed my translation and would like to feed my caffeine addiction, click on the button below and graciously give me my fix—I mean, a cup of coffee.
Dcrangerange
February 20, 2023 at 1:37 amThanks for the chapter. Yay for almost getting to the retribution.
yoshsreads
February 20, 2023 at 2:27 amAlmost.
Leon Declis
February 20, 2023 at 6:31 amJesus Christ, get on with it, ladies.
Reality19
February 28, 2023 at 10:37 pmYeah I have no problem with comedy and I understand the author is trying to lighten the novel, but goddamn the slapstick takes too long and is run into the ground every time
Joy
February 20, 2023 at 6:35 amIts toooooo many willy-nilly goddamnt, just get over with the curse already bruh 😩
Yorsh
February 20, 2023 at 7:49 amThank you for the chapter, getting to the good part soon it seems.