“Schizophrenic …… My son?”
“Yes,…… he needs treatment now.”
“I-it can’t be….”
The doctor said that hallucinations, delusions, and thought disorder were observed, and that they fit into the category of “positive symptoms”.
Symptoms include disturbances in thinking and ego, and loss of coherence in thoughts and actions.
He has a tendency to engage in chaotic conversations and thoughts, become violent, and act in an inconsistent manner….
There are many people who could be affected by such an illness ………. There are not many people that fit the bill as well as Ryosuke does.
It’s not a disease that a student should get,…….
Imagining Ryosuke’s despair and suffering, Rinka cried out loudly. The reason for Ryosuke’s condition was that he was in a state of shock. Kazuhiko is also the cause of what happened to Ryosuke. …… not wanted to be touched by such a man.
“……… I’m sorry.”
He looked at the palm that had been removed.
Kazuhiko was very much aware of this.
He knew that he was the one who had pushed Ryosuke into a corner.
“……I-It can be cured, right?”
Kazuhiko asked on behalf of a sobbing Rinka, and the doctor answered his question as he looked at the material.
“Support from family, medication…then there’s a good chance that he’ll recover as long as he stays at rest.”
The doctor’s words made Kazuhiko’s chest drop in relief,……, but he rolled his eyes when he heard what the doctor continued to say.
“─ ─ However, please stay away from the person who is the cause of Ryosuke Yamamoto’s illness. …… It will disturb his mind. And please don’t let him near traumatized places or things as much as possible.”
The doctor said this while looking at Kazuhiko.
He was aware of the situation to a certain extent as a medical caregiver. He knew that his father was the main cause of the trauma, and he strongly told him not to let him have any contact with him.
Kazuhiko was tormented by remorse and kept his face down. Kazuhiko was so ashamed of himself that he fell on his face.
“Sleeping in bed,……, would you like to go see him?”
Rinka replied and followed the doctor.
“—-You son of a b*tch!”
Kotaro was waiting in the waiting room.
When he saw Kazuhiko coming back alone, he punched him in the face as hard as he could.
“Hey, y-you can’t do that!”
Usui, who had heard what happened and rushed to the hospital, intervened in the fight.
However, Kotaro’s eyes were still full of anger. The violence may have stopped, but the verbal abuse did not.
He grabbed Kazuhiko by the chest and shouted.
“You! You drove Ryosuke to that point! I told you over and over again! I told you to trust him!”
—-Yes, that’s right.
It may not look like he cares that much, but Kotaro was also concerned about Ryosuke and was working behind the scenes. The reason he didn’t tell Ryosuke was because he didn’t want to burden him……. In fact, Kotaro has tried to persuade Kazuhiko many times.
But each time—-
[What does a journalist know!?]
He had been rebuffed.
“Ryosuke-kun’s false accusation has finally been cleared …… and there are so many fun things waiting for him from now on?! And yet he’s suffering from schizophrenia!? Cut is out with that bullsh*t! Why did he have to suffer so much?!”
It was really unfortunate.
His sister Rinka thanked him for taking Ryosuke to the hospital, but he sincerely regretted that he had pretended to be a bystander and avoided excessive contact with him.
(What a spirit of steel! Stop making assumptions! I’m such an idiot!)
He lamented his lack of discernment.
He really believed that Ryosuke was a man with a strong spirit, and because of that prejudice……he still can’t repent even if he regrets it.
If they had interacted with each other on a regular basis, he would have been able to notice the abnormality much earlier. Kotaro clenched his fists and showed a hint of regret.
“……Usui-kun,…… go see Ryosuke, please.”
Usui went to the hospital room as he was told.
He has always protected his nephew, his childhood friend, his mother, and his best friend…Ryosuke would surely be happy if he went there instead of himself, and although sad, Kotaro understands that …… so there is only one thing for him to do.
(……I’m going to make you pay for hurting Ryosuke!)
After seeing Usui off, Kotaro walked out of the hospital without looking at the drooping Kazuhiko — in his hand he was clutching the documents that Ryosuke had given him.
─ ─ I’m going to be hospitalized starting today.
Mai is by my side now.
I don’t know if I’m crazy…… but I think I’m perfectly normal. ……
My mom came to me later and said—
“Are you okay?”
Then Usui-kun came.
My beloved people are all here. …… I’m so happy.
I don’t know why I’m in the hospital at all.
“Ryosuke…… Do you want to leave your house?”
Is he talking about getting a divorce after Nagisa graduates from college? If so, I told her I’d go with her.
When I told her about it, she shook her head and said, “No that”.
“…… after you get discharged from the hospital. …… I heard that brother Kotaro is going to prepare a house for Ryosuke to live in.”
There is no obligation for him to do that for me.
I haven’t talked to my uncle much until today, and he can’t take care of me, and it would cause me a lot of trouble.
“…… Ryosuke, you’re a good boy, and brother is helping you, okay? Why don’t you go away from your father, Kaede and the others and relax a little?”
“…… good boy?”
No, I’m not a good boy.
Mom doesn’t know anything about …… what I’m up to.
She would absolutely despise …… me if she knew about my revenge and how I hit Kirishima,…… but…
For some reason, I felt the need to talk about it and clear my head.
There are only people who are important to me here. Mai, my mother, and Usui-kun…… I can speak my true feelings in front of them all.
And I think I’m at my limit, too.
Lately, before I go to bed, I fantasize about revenge…… and it’s as real as if it’s happening in real life.
It’s keeping me up at night. …… But I thought maybe if I talked to everyone here …… it would make me feel a little better.
So I decided to be brave.
It pains me to show my ugliness to the people I love, but I thought …… these three people might listen to me without scorn.
I decided to trust the people who had helped me…
I decided to trust them—
“…… mother…… I’m not a good boy at all.”
“Hmm? Why not?”
I inhaled …… and let out all the stuff I’d been holding in.
“I’m always thinking about hurting someone. The other day I thought about grabbing a box cutter and stabbing someone. I’ve thought about pouring coffee on them, and I’ve thought about throwing cookies at them. Recently, I’ve been violent with Kirishima, who had her hands on Mai, and I’m even thinking of taking revenge on sister and father! I’m not a good boy at all! I am…. totally—
The three of them shouted at the same time.
Rinka hugged Ryosuke and patted him gently on the back.
Mai also went around to the other side and hugged Ryosuke from there as if she was gently handling him.
Usui looked at the three of them with …… tears in his eyes.
And as his best friend, he cursed …… his own incompetence for not noticing the anomaly when he was so cornered.
“Ryosuke,……mother is sorry? I’m sorry …… for not noticing you until now. ……”
“I’m sorry too,…… sorry for being a weak childhood friend,…… sorry for making you attack a girl because of me,……!”
“……oh ……everyone ……aah ……gu… …”
It was no longer possible to act stoutheartedly.
Rinka and his childhood friend are crying and hugging him…and Usui, who is watching them from a distance, is also shedding big tears.
The tears that had never flowed in the six months since he gave up on everything, began to overflow unceasingly.
“I-I want you to help me… Mom…Mai…Usui-kun…I’ve really reached my limit…it’s been so hard, but I can’t talk to anyone, and I can’t say I want revenge…anymore. It’s no good to face it alone… I’m really sorry for hiding it until now… Mom… It was really painful… When I heard that Mai was attacked by Kirishima, I couldn’t forgive her and went to get revenge… I feel like I’ve been kicked for a long time, please help me I’m tired of hating someone!My life isn’t for revenge…more like a normal person I want to live, but my head doesn’t understand!!”
Ryosuke spoke his mind through sobs.
And this is the symptom of schizophrenia. No matter how much he refuses to accept it, his thoughts are always leading in a negative direction.
His hatred of those around him is undeniably his true feelings, but his desire to kill and harm others is the result of his illness.
He has been locked in a dark cage and forced to fight according to his “true feelings,” which he does not remember.
The three who were listening in silence were so miserable that they could only utter a few simple words. And they couldn’t stop crying at their own unworthiness for not noticing it at all, even though it had driven him to this point.
Ryosuke had planned to take this matter to his grave.
But he gathered up his courage and told them everything, and this decision changed his life forever.
After a short period of crying, the four of them were engaged in pleasant conversation. Mai was surprised to see Usui for the first time since elementary school. She looked a little scared and surprised to see him.
Rinka and Usui had never met before, but she thanked Usui from the bottom of her heart for still treating her as a friend.
“Usui-kun? What’s wrong?”
“Are you thirsty? I’ll get you some juice!”
“…..Puu….Orange juice, then.”
Usui-kun also asked my mother and Mai what they wanted to drink, and went to the vending machine to buy it.
I like that about Usui-kun.
He is probably embarrassed because Mom praised him.
“─ ─ Ryosuke. Speaking of which, about earlier, you don’t have to stop taking revenge on Kazuhiko-san.”
It was sudden and unexpected …… I thought she’d stop me because she was so kind. But Mom had a devious look in her eyes.
“Ah, but don’t plan on taking down the company, okay? Let’s take over his company, fair and square!”
“Yeah. …… Ryosuke’s way is going to cause trouble for a lot of people. You didn’t think that far ahead, did you?”
“It’s true,……I thought the company was a treasure only for your father,…… but when I think about it calmly, if the company goes under, the employees will be inconvenienced.”
It would be unethical.
I didn’t think that much about it. ……I didn’t want to get anyone else involved, but I was about to do something really terrible. ……I can clearly see now that it was a bad idea.
I’m feeling clearer than I have in a long time, my thoughts are clearer and I can think about things more calmly.
I’m really glad I talked to her about it. ……
And my mom continues to talk while holding my hand.
Ryosuke,……, the company that mother’s working for now,……is a subcontractor of your father’s……. So I know a lot about that guy’s company. …… Leave it to me, okay?”
Mom speaks confidently.
Unfortunately, I can’t help much because I’m still learning. I hope I don’t disappoint her…
……bang, bang, bang….
This time, next to her, Mai slapped her cheeks to get back into the swing of things.
“…Alright! I’ll take care of Kaede!”
Is she talking about revenge against my sister?
You were inspired by mother, weren’t you, ……?
I told her that I was thinking of a plan to make her dependent on me and throw her away, and she pinched me with all her might. …… She asked me what my revenge was, and I told her honestly, but it was terrible.
—-Mai stood up slowly from the chair she was sitting in.
(I’m not going to end up being beaten! I’m going to pay back Kaede for everything she has done to me!)
Mai swore to herself.
However, she has no idea what she should do. …… She is an opponent who is completely outmatched in terms of power and academics.
Still, she wants to help Ryosuke.
After much thought and pondering from Kaede’s point of view,……, she came up with a certain extreme theory.
“Please m-marry me!”
—-The best revenge against Kaede was to marry him.
End of volume 1
20 comments »
Kent Louie WashingtonNovember 13, 2022 at 12:25 am
Wow mai doesn’t hold back
andrer30November 13, 2022 at 12:58 am
men, really love the way is happening things
Mr KNovember 13, 2022 at 1:13 am
Ok Mai, that went from 0 to 100 real fast
ionlyfollowweebstuff🔞 (@ionlyfollowwee1)November 13, 2022 at 1:44 am
Wow, Mai out of nowhere with the best revenge plan, not only agaisnt the sisters, but also every other girl that pined for him.
MagikarpNovember 13, 2022 at 2:21 am
Ending is way too sudden and random.
GalactaNovember 13, 2022 at 3:13 am
FINALLY SOME REVENGE, I thought it would be like every other novel on novel updates like this where the protag would forgive everyone and forget everything, but this novel finally gives some well deserved revenge. Thats enough for a 10/10 for me.
oxidxneNovember 13, 2022 at 4:26 am
karnal0zNovember 13, 2022 at 4:27 am
This is only the epilogue of the chapter 1. The novel is continue.
GattsNovember 13, 2022 at 4:52 am
Thank you for the chapter !
Strawberry MilkshakeNovember 13, 2022 at 5:11 am
YOOO MAI DID THE ULTIMATE MOVE!!
AirpoolNovember 13, 2022 at 3:42 pm
I read first 5 chapter and suddenly I see a epilogue for this chapter and I can’t help but say this very tragedy novel…
DecadeNovember 13, 2022 at 5:06 pm
Seeing MC break down like that made me cry.
He didn’t deserve the 1 year hell he was put in.
Thank Goodness a few people believed in him. I suspect he might have killed himself to get out of his despair.
Props for his uncle in finding the truth.
Im more shocked with MCs mother and Mai’s revenge plan didnt see that coming.
Looking forward on what comes next.
Im also reading the raw material because I cant wait anymore.
ishiraNovember 13, 2022 at 7:01 pm
What a weird ending, I feel like it’s too forced to be “beautiful” ending. I don’t say it couldn’t, but it feels forced.
SoafpNovember 13, 2022 at 7:30 pm
It’s not over
hanzosheeshNovember 15, 2022 at 7:52 am
Patrick Joe YapNovember 16, 2022 at 7:47 am
the fact he told the truth while breaking down was heartbreaking
AkireiNovember 20, 2022 at 5:37 pm
This is heavy, the novel is hard and depressing like I haven’t seen before. However, Ryosuke is very fortunate. I am sure he will be very happy in the future. If not, I will seriously curse author-sama.
YotsubaFebruary 3, 2023 at 11:30 pm
Mai just went from a 9 to a 10.
Though it’s kinda funny. I have a mental image of her as being kind of plain and gruff, with a simple shoulder length haircut.
Luo (@luohuo123)February 5, 2023 at 11:36 am
mai going for the W, but man this chapter was sad
WikkrMarch 8, 2023 at 10:34 pm
Nice to see a novel exploring mental health issues from extreme trauma.
Mai is a genius. Shes worked out what the sister is all about and is taking steps to f*ck up any chance of success.
The best revenge is a life well lived.