Translated and Edited by: luccayn.
-san: A polite suffix, but not excessively formal.
-kun: A common suffix among friends and younger people.
-chan: A common suffix among people you’re close with, mostly used for feminine nicknames and girls, since it’s cutesy and childlike.
-senpai: A common suffix and noun used to address or refer to one’s older or more senior colleagues in a school, workplace, dojo, or sports club.
“T… Thank you… Thank you…”
“Really, thank you very much… Ah, I’m so glad~ So glad~”
Dekiri and the director of the bureau cried their eyes out apologizing and thanking me for not pursuing the matter further. I managed to get them to believe in me, though it took a long time and it was hard work. Meanwhile, the mayor and the governor stood apologetically beside the two sobbing women.
“Thank you very much for your generosity. Although neither Dekiri nor the Director was directly involved in the tampering, they could have received jail time if it had been customary. We would not have been spared from resignation either. Once again, thank you very much.”
The elderly mayor bent and bowed deeply, expressing her gratitude. Her hair was donned in silver, indicating the many trials she went through in her life.
“No, um… It’s fine, really. Thank you for reinstating my benefits, they will help me manage my living expenses.”
“I never expected I’d be thanked today…”
The governor, well over her 60th birthday, chuckled slightly.
“But is it really the best course of action? Dekiri and these officials aside, how could one ignore the employees who were directly involved in the falsification of your data?”
I’m certain it’s the best course of action. All in all, I just don’t want anything to do with resentment ever again, nor the things that might create it. Moreover, I think the ones who tampered with my data were also victims due to the curse… It was a force majeure in this case.
…I just don’t want to risk getting anyone angry at me and starting the hell all over again.
“Everyone makes mistakes, and ones of this magnitude are just cute,” I couldn’t just say the culprit of this whole ordeal was the curse, so I just laughed and tried to throw a one-liner at the end. However, it was a mistake on my part. I ended up sounding pretentious and corny instead.
Tama and Shu raved loudly beside me, against all of my preconceptions.
“Tsune-chan? Tsune-chan?! Why are you suddenly throwing one-liners? What do you want me to do, fall harder for you?! Oh, does this mean I can attack you? It’s fine, right?!”
“Let’s attack… Let’s attack! I can’t wait any longer! Let’s do something bad and ask him to forgive us for our cute mistakes! I can’t wait to be held accountable~!”
Oh no, not you two. I won’t let any mistakes pass. You’re the exception—I thought to myself. However, it wasn’t just the two goddesses who reacted to my words. The section chief of Hello Work then stepped forward.
“Mikuni-san. I will be twenty-eight this year, and this is the first time I have encountered love. I have never met a man like you in my life. Please, marry me,” her proposal was stiff, the furthest thing from a joke.
Hey, today is the first time we ever met each other, right? So what are you even on about? If you say marriage so casually, your parents will end up crying, won’t they?
“Mikuni-san… Mikuni-san! …Mikuni-saaaaaaaan!!! I like you, I llike youuu! I love you! I will keep you fed and support you, so please marry meeeee!!!”
“M, M, Mikuni-san… I, I, I like you… P, please marry me… I, I’ll take responsibility and m, make you happy…”
“Uhehehe… Let’s be husband and wife… So, can I suckle on your fingernails?”
“Screw off, Dekiri! …Mikuni-san~♡ Marry me, please! I am in love with youuuuuuu!!!”
Akagami, Marui, Dekiri, and the director all suddenly proposed to me, but all I could do was stand there in shock. What’s up with this… I’m once again in a situation I can barely wrap my head around in.
“Mikuni-san. I have a daughter who is now just shy of 20 years old…. She is a very good-natured and charming girl. Would you like to meet her?”
“Mayor, aren’t you being disingenuous? Sorry about that, she’s a jerk… Thank you very much for this opportunity, however. I would like to bring my granddaughter next time, so would you like to have dinner with us? Is there anything you’d like to eat?”
“Governor… Aren’t you the disingenuous one here? What you are saying is no different from my proposal.”
“I am only inviting him for dinner. Nothing more, nothing less.”
The governor and the mayor herself started to join in the trouble as well, along with every single person in this room. More than unhinged, it was out of control, and all I could do was scratch my head and try to figure out just what was happening.
After some time, the mayor and the governor—who barely kept their reason, mind you—stopped the big proposal battle.
Honestly, I’m happy to be suddenly favored by others, but they suddenly got too close to me as if I was some sort of prey. At that moment, despite knowing I was going to be okay, I still got defensive and was afraid to be hit. Memories of what happened during my last twenty years alive flashed through my mind as I stepped back.
It was heartbreaking.
A bit later, when their excitement calmed down, the women left the room saying they were going to work on the documents and on getting my benefits all sorted out immediately. Thus, only the goddesses and I remained in that room.
“This time it’s Tsune-chan’s fault. There isn’t a woman out there who wouldn’t fall in love when you throw one of those cool-a*s movie one-liners. Be careful and mind what you say!” Tama started complaining as soon as we were left alone. Her tone was serious.
“…I didn’t say anything weird,” I said back. No words that left my mouth were worthy of that reaction… In fact, I think they are the weird ones here.
“You did, and you don’t even know you did it! They falsified your family register, but you still said you’d let bygones be bygones! Not only that, but you started acting all warm and kind! You’re doing too much for too many people! I wasn’t kidding, do you wish to be attacked?!”
“But you were the ones who were about to attack me,” I told Tama and Shu.
“Ah… Um, i-it was an accident, so no can do…” She suddenly forgot what she was saying and started muttering. “Sh*t, I can’t argue back…” She wrinkled her brow.
Would you look at that?
“Hmm, could I ask you something?” Ignoring Tama’s turmoil, Shu’s eyes lit up red. I wonder what she was gazing at…
“What is it?”
“Why were you so nice toward these women?”
I couldn’t understand her question. I don’t remember being overtly nice or anything… However, as I was lost for an answer, the crimson glint in her eyes dissipated, and they turned back to normal.
“I’m sorry for asking such a strange question. I understand, so I’ll leave it at that… Fufu, it’s a miracle, isn’t it?” Shu’s face as she said that was troubled yet happy, all in a gentle kind of way. “Tama-san, rejoice. His kindness is natural. Tsune-kun is the kind of man that can be kind to a woman without any qualms.”
“Huh? What do you mean?” Tama was confused, to which Shu turned to me.
“Don’t you know that women are obsessed with men, Tsune-kun?”
“Huh? Um… Yeah, they treat them very gently.”
I’ve seen it happen in a few places back when I was still cursed. Whenever I’d see a woman interact with another man, I always asked myself what was the difference between me and them.
“How would you feel if you were pampered?”
“Well, I guess I’d be happy…”
“And how would you feel if they were annoyingly sticky to you?”
What’s up with that question? I couldn’t understand what she was getting at, but I’d never been remotely close to a situation like that. For me, that would be just a dream.
“I, I’d thank them…?” That was the answer I came up with after imagining myself swarmed by kind women.
What’s this even about again?
“What do you think, Tama-san? This is Tsune-kun.”
“H, huh? Wait a second! Don’t you think women are annoying your creepy, Tsune-chan?!”
How do you even see me, huh? “Why would I think such a horrible thing?”
What kind of thought process do you need to have to think badly of someone who pours their heart and soul for you?
“I, if I were to hold your hand… how would you feel?”
I heard something strange again. Albeit embarrassed, she didn’t slur her words. Instead, she looked at me with a gaze so serious I couldn’t help but answer honestly.
“I’d just be happy in general…”
Not once in my life had a woman touched me in a non-violent manner. Just the thought of kind physical contact was enough of a dream, and holding hands with a girl as beautiful as Tama would make me especially happy.
—Not that I’d tell her that though. She would get carried away.
“So if I gave you a sloppy, tongue-twister French kiss, you’d still be happy?”
“Where did the talk about holding hands go?!”
She suddenly went graphic on me. Oh, if only it weren’t for these relapses, they would be perfect beauties… What a waste.
“Tama-san, calm down. Don’t lower the favorability you just raised like that,” Shu warned her with a chop.
“…Isn’t it crazy that he’s handsome, has good style, is kind, and doesn’t get angry even when he’s being s*xually harassed? I’ve only ever seen men like this in erotic manga.”
“I believe it comes from his upbringing, where he was raised without the benefits of a man. His difference from other men must be a side effect of living in a small world, one where all he ever did was go back and forth between his home and his job without any relationships with others,” Shu explained. “Combined with his optimism, he turned out to be a strong man. If this isn’t a miracle, nothing is.”
The two goddesses looked at me with lit-up faces, as if they had just discovered an age-old secret from somewhere. I couldn’t help but feel left out.
“I can’t see the full picture here…”
Despite hearing what they had to say, I still felt something amiss. What is that about me being the byproduct of a miracle?
“You know, normal men are cold to women.”
“Huh…? You don’t know?”
I don’t. What kind of reason would they have to be like that?
“Men generally think they can do whatever they want with women, and that’s because women usually follow whatever a man tells them to do. Well, it doesn’t help that there’s an overabundance of women across every country in the world.”
“Many women are treated like slaves, and be aware that goddesses are no exception, okay? I mean, we can’t just expect a man to worship us just because we are ethereal beings, y’know?”
“T, that’s terrible…”
Other men are like that? I couldn’t help but wince. However, after hearing their explanation of the current state of the world, I understood why the officials were all on their knees earlier.
“So they were all afraid because the family register of a man was falsified, specifically?”
Shu nodded in response. “You’re correct. If it had been another man in your place, he would’ve reported the incident. That’s why the women were so scared.”
“It’s a grave felony to violate men’s rights. If it weren’t for you, these women would’ve had their whole lives ruined.”
My boiling point isn’t as low… as my sisters’. Swishing that thought aside, I asked about something else that was bothering me.
“Oh, when I made a cup of tea, they all made such a big deal about it, was that—”
“The average man never serves food. The women must’ve felt despair as soon as you got up to do something, thinking that they might’ve caused more trouble when all they came here to do was apologize,” Tama completed whatever I had to say.
I don’t think what I did was domineering in any way… I just wanted to serve some tea…
“Ah, and Akagi-san was angry with the officials because they—”
“It’s because she found out they were involved in harassing a precious man. In particular, she couldn’t handle someone as good-looking as you being treated so pitifully,” Shu was the one to complete my words this time.
“I just think she was trying to show her good side to Tsune-chan. She got angry in his stead, all while trying to raise her own favorability,” Tama added her own two cents.
“Ah… That’s a possibility. She doesn’t seem to be very popular,” Shu agreed.
“Argh… No good, no good! I hate desperate girls soooo much!”
If you two get so angry together, you seem like the desperate ones—I decided to keep this one to myself.
“Anyway!” Shu changed the subject. “I can’t let it go since it’s due to the curse, but Tsune-kun’s kind self is the ideal for the opposite s*x. No woman in the world will leave you alone.”
“Me being the ideal? That’s too much. I understand what you’re saying, but you’re exaggerating and praising me too much.”
They answered my casual remark with cold glares. From their expressions alone, I could guess what they were thinking. Something along the lines of, ‘This guy is too much…’
“Didn’t you hear the women proposing to you just now? Do you think they weren’t serious?”
“The proposal? Of course, I know how serious one is.”
However, they still met me just today, so there’s no way they’d be serious about that proposal. It was certainly a joke.
“You definitely don’t know what you look like, Tsune-kun,” Shu blurted out.
But I do! And hey, stop judging me by my looks alone!
Tama let out a sigh and continued the conversation. “I’ll change the question. Did you know that women may approach men, but they never confess or propose out of nowhere?”
That was news to me. I would’ve thought they’d be more aggressive if they were competing for the scarce men. Are they just shyer than I thought?
“Because if they fail to propose, they will end up never getting married.”
“Huh?” I let out a dumb sound after being hit with the unexpected. Is the penalty for proposing such a harsh one?
“I still don’t think you understand, so I’ll explain. If a woman who has failed to confess her feelings or propose to a man tries to go for a different man, she will be labeled as a ‘woman that’s flirted with more than one man’, and won’t be able to get married.”
“So why don’t they just hide it…?”
“Even if they don’t tell anyone, another will end up exposing them. Rival women will find out all about their past trials and report back to men. Marriage is a struggle, nay, it is war!”
An image of women kicking each other down suddenly flashed into my mind. Ah… I wonder if such methods are really necessary to win against their rivals.
—Wait a second!
“T, then, the officers’ proposals…”
Tama answered my question while looking at me with her cat-like eyes. “They were that determined to marry you. If they couldn’t, they had the resolve to be single for the rest of their lives. So? Do you feel the urgency of this situation now?”
Now I do.
Only after being explained the situation of the world paired with mine that I understood… This is even more outrageous than I thought it’d be.
T/N: Damn, this world is tough.
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