Chapter 6: Regrets of Miyo Shiraki
Translator: Soafp
[Shiraki PoV]
“I like you, Shinzaki-kun, who is kind to everyone and reliable.”
I, Miyo Shiraki, called my classmate Yusei Shinzaki to the back of the school building and confessed my love to him.
It was a confession, but it was what you might call a lie.
Behind me lurked Akari Kinoshita and Yuki Kawashima.
Yes, I was told by these two that I should lie to him because it would be fun.
At first I took it lightly.
But little by little the two of them revealed their dissatisfaction.
I was afraid that people would hate me.
That they would despise me and ignore me.
So I did what they told me to do and lied to him.
But I really liked him.
As to why I liked him, well, it is a trivial thing, but I am prettier than others.
Because of that, there were a lot of people who confessed to me just because of my looks.
I was fed up with that.
But he didn’t show any such pretense and saw me as Miyo Shiraki.
Not just the cute Miyo Shiraki, but as a classmate and friend, Miyo Shiraki.
I was really happy about that.
I found myself following him with my gaze.
At first, I was happy to see him because it was the first time he saw my inner self.
But that was really only in the beginning.
He has a childhood friend, a girl named Himari.
Himari is kind to everyone without discrimination, and she is very active and energetic.
Many boys are in love with her.
When I saw him and her talking happily, I felt a kind of tightness in my heart.
At first I told myself it was just my imagination.
But I still noticed my feelings, even if I didn’t want to.
I naturally followed him with my eyes, and when I saw him talking happily with other girls, my heart ached.
Yeah, I like Shinzaki-kun.
I’ve been lying to myself since I realized that.
No, perhaps this lie is a turning point for me.
I have been looking at him for a long time and all I felt was pain and tightness in my chest.
If that’s the case, I should just tell him how I feel about him and let it all go away.
So I told him how I really felt using the lying as a shield.
After I told him how I really felt, my mind went blank.
I couldn’t think of anything.
I was afraid to hear his answer.
But, to my surprise, he agreed easily.
I will never forget that moment.
It was the kind of feeling that makes me feel as if my anxiety is instantly lifted.
I was so happy, so happy, I was over the moon.
From that point on, I took advantage of the fact that I was his girlfriend and actively tried to contact him.
Sometimes we went home together, and sometimes we ate lunch together on the rooftop.
I really enjoyed my time with him.
However, I confessed my love to him with a lie, so that happiness did not last long.
“Hey, Miyo.”
It was Akari who called out to me.
“What is it?”
“It’s been almost a week, you should dump him.”
Akari said with a laugh.
At that moment, I felt a tremendous sense of disgust.
Why would she say such a thing?
It’s fine, we’re still going out.
That’s what I thought.
But as Akari said, I would feel guilty if I made a false confession and went out with him.
Besides, I don’t want Akari and Yuki to hate me.
That’s what I thought.
So I called him to the back of the school building again.
He was kind and cool.
Both Akari and Yuki told me to act it was funny.
But I had decided beforehand what I would say.
I tell him that it was a lie, and apologize honestly.
Then I would tell him how I really felt.
That’s what I thought.
I suddenly felt embarrassed and said something that had never crossed my mind.
“I lied to you because I thought it would be fun.”
The two guys came out from behind me, both of them holding back their laughter.
No! That is not what I meant!
But I couldn’t stop myself from saying it.
“Well, don’t give me that look, it was just a joke.”
Thinking in my head about what I said.
A joke, huh?
I’m so selfish.
Mocking myself.
“Hey, say something!”
Mou, I hate this
In the end, I betrayed Shinzaki-kun because I didn’t want the two of them to hate me.
But maybe Shinzaki-kun would forgive me?
If it’s Shinzaki-kun, who is kind and cool to everyone.
That’s what I thought.
And I immediately regretted thinking that.
“Aah, shut up will you”
“Eh?”
I was frightened by his voice, which did not even try to hide the disgust in it that emanated from him.
He paused for a moment.
“Did you lie to me because you think it’s funny?”
He said this in a voice that was not soft like his previous ones, but sounded as if he had given up on something, and as if he despised us in front of him.
“T-that’s right. Is it wrong?”
Of course it’s wrong.
I knew that in my head, but my mouth started to move on its own.
“You can’t be serious, huh?”
Of course I’m not serious!
I wanted to say that, but I couldn’t speak.
My mouth, which had been moving well until a few minutes ago, was not moving at all.
“Shiraki, Kinoshita, and Kawashima, what you are doing is trampling on people’s feelings, don’t you know that?”
I know.
I know that.
“It doesn’t matter, if it’s fun. “
Mou, I can’t take it anymore.
“Well, I’m glad to know you guys are scum.”
With that, he left.
I had big tears in the corners of my eyes.
I deserved everything.
It was only natural.
I was the one who stepped on his feelings.
He eventually disappeared without ever looking back.
It was really over.
Those happy days.
I had become a piece of sh*t in his mind, if only it had been that simple.
The next day I was in despair.
Not because he broadcast yesterday’s conversation.
I felt an incredible sense of guilt that I had changed him from the kind man he was.
That was the true nature of my despair.
Yeah, I really am
a human piece of sh*t.
Dennis Vicarth
July 24, 2022 at 12:56 amHA! I knew it, she had every opportunity to keep her love but she chose the approval of her shitty friends.
Zales
July 24, 2022 at 4:50 ameach girl in this story are ….
one never tell her feeling even when MC directly ask
and one priority her bad friends more than her love
Gatts
July 24, 2022 at 5:25 amThank you for the chapter !
Funny User Name
July 24, 2022 at 8:40 amShe has a proper assessment of herself if nothing else.
k1nng
July 25, 2022 at 1:37 amwell, it’s following the pattern of the other works, classic cliché, I don’t even feel angry anymore
Luo (@luohuo123)
February 5, 2023 at 6:34 pmwell she is right about being a piece of s**t aright