[Unforgivable. I will never forgive them]
I had never hated someone so intensely before.
I will never forgive them for hurting the person I love, and I will deny the very world they want.
When I got home, I took a picture of Towa and Shu-kun and painted Shu-kun’s face black with a pen.
[This one too,…… and this one too,…… and this one too!]
I was a little hesitant …… to do this, not only with Shu-kun, but also with his family, but I also got rid of the photo that had my mother in it.
In the pitch black room, I made up my mind —– I’m going to make sure those people regret it.
I will repay them dozens …… or even hundreds of times over for hurting the person I love so much.
[That’s what …… is all about, making their lives a mess and a bitter mess.]
I can’t tell Towa about this, because he’s very kind.
[I’m going to make them despair for sure.]
I will make them despair with everything I have.
Hey Shu-kun, if you want me so badly, then be prepared, okay? I will never become yours. On the contrary, I will use all of your thoughts and feelings towards me to sink you into the depths of sorrow.
I will give you everything until then —- happiness and joy.
But after that, you know what?
[I will rob you of everything.]
This was my decision, and I was firmly prepared to set in motion the scenario that would lead to their demise.
However, I didn’t spend the rest of my days just being motivated by hatred.
[Ayana, what’s wrong?]
I was enjoying, from the bottom of my heart, the days with Towa-kun, who had been discharged from the hospital and was now in good health.
The hospital stay lasted a bit longer, and after he was discharged from the hospital, he was told that he should not do too much exercise, so inevitably, Towa-kun left soccer behind.
It was regrettable, and Akemi and I had talked about it.
[Towa-kun, is there anything you want me to do for you? I’ll do anything for you, Towa-kun.]
If there is one thing I need to apologize to Towa-kun for a little, it is that I took advantage of his sadness a little bit.
Towa-kun has become healthy and reassured me and Akemi, but I often saw his listless appearance at a moment’s notice.
This is why I wanted Towa-kun to rely on me when his heart was weak, and that’s why I sought Towa-kun’s heart in an easy-to-understand way.
[Why …… why are you not resisting?]
[The reason is that there is no need for it. After all, I am the one who wants it.]
It is unthinkable for me to resist having a relationship with Towa-kun.
Although I felt like a bad woman, I was able to forget everything by having a relationship with Towa-kun and soaking up the happiness I felt for a time.
Towa-kun sleeping on my chest was adorable. I even pressed my face against his sleeping head and sniffed him.
I feel like if Towa-kun saw me, he would certainly pull a face, but I am conversely proud of myself for getting excited by Towa-kun’s scent, because I basically think that girls are like that when they are with someone they like.
[Towa-kun, please leave everything to me, okay? I will clean up all the people who said terrible and awful things to Towa-kun. I’ll make sure to use all of them. ……]
[…..Well, at least for now, I can enjoy this sleeping face …… Ufufufu~♪]
This might not be a good idea.
I must have had a really difficult and terrible expression on my face just now…but one thing I can say for sure is that I’m happy right now.
But at the same time, I feel like something is spilling out of my heart.
I sometimes dream of a future that I no longer desire or dream of, but that I might have had.
I have a dream of a future that I no longer desire or dream about, but that I might have had. And Towa-kun!
[Wait, Shu-kun! Towa too!]
[Crap! Run away, Shu-kun!]
[Yes! Run, Towa-kun!]
If there was such a future without hatred and sorrow, would I have wanted it?
The answer to this question was not likely to come out no matter how much time passed.
“Hey Ayana, when we get to school, can you show me your homework assignment?”
“Again? You’ve got to learn to do your own homework, you know?”
I was watching them from behind as they were about to arrive at school.
I thought about it earlier, but despite what happened yesterday, Ayana is still talking to me and to Shu in the same way she always does.
(……I guess I’m a little relieved.)
To tell the truth, I was a little relieved to see her like that.
My mind has certainly changed, and I’m ready to accept and live in this newborn life.
But I was also sure that I was still a little nervous.
“I’m going to do what I can do. So that I can walk out as me, in the true sense of the word.”
To do that, I will always remember what’s stuck in my throat.
That’s because it must be the core of the mystery that I still hold in this world.
“Hmm? Where’s Shu?”
I was lost in my thoughts and seemed to be in a daze until I was approached by Ayana.
The only person beside me was Ayana, and I couldn’t see Shu. I looked for him to see where he had gone, and I saw the moment he was caught by Iori and was taken away.
“She took him away.”
“It looks like it …….”
Although he gave us a look like he wanted us to help him, Ayana and I waved our hands and looked away from Shu’s appearance.
Ayana and I were walking along with the other students, blending in with the crowd of students around us.
Ayana murmured to me in a whisper.
“Yesterday was great, wasn’t it, Master?”
The moment Shu is gone, Ayana whispers in a bewitching tone.
The students walking nearby would never have heard her, but my ears clearly picked up her words and I was thrilled.
“How was it, Towa-kun? Was my body satisfying you?”
Ayana looks like a girl who has been turned into a boy while the girl is being dyed, a look that is far removed from her usual dignity and beauty.
Still, even such a sexy expression suits her, whether it’s because she’s an erotic heroine or simply because she has a sex appeal. …… Either way, I chuckled at Ayana’s charm, and I thought that was also her attractiveness.
“Right. It was great …… and most of all you were cute.”
Ayana smiled, her cheeks flushed red.
I almost fell in love with Ayana’s adorable face, but seeing her like this gave me a lot to think about.
My current relationship with Ayana is nothing more than a halfway relationship.
And I, who am almost satisfied with our current relationship, am also nothing but a half-hearted b*****d.
(…… I remember a lot of things and what I found out is similar. I have a dim sense that Ayana has something going on. That’s why I want to do something about it.)
I think that is what I must do.
This is not something that I feel obligated to do or forced to do,……, but I will definitely reach a goal that I can be satisfied with, both for Towa and for myself.
I hope to find the meaning of what I have come to this world, and that I will not regret what I have done in this world.
“What is it?”
“……Ah~uhm, I’m looking forward to working with you?”
“Fufu, you’re so weird, Towa. Yes! Same to you♪”
Well, I was still thrilled by her cute smile and averted my gaze.
I have a feeling that a lot of hard things are about to happen, and moreover, I might learn more about the dark side hidden in this world.
But I would not give up. Her smile made me vow to do so.
(I will definitely grab a better future. That is my goal.)
No matter what the outcome may be, no matter if this world cannot escape from the fate of the game, I will surely grasp in my hands an ending that will make me glad I took action.
End of volume 1
TL: WN is here